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rafesslxt · 8 months ago

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Showerhead 2 | mattheo riddle

pt. 2 — you can find pt. 1 here

summary: after you and mattheo had some fun in the shower, you two can‘t stop thinking about each other and that night. But who gives in first to sin again after a little jealousy?

words: 5,1k

warnings: heavy dirty talk again, cursing, making out, dry humping, teasing, controlling, praising, bj, unprotected p in v, shower, swallowing, legilimency (mind reading),

note: you don‘t have to read part 1 for this part but have fun if you want to

— in the great hall —

After that night in the shower 2 weeks ago, I couldn‘t stop thinking about it. I dreamed about it in my sleep, daydreamed about it in class and lunch while Hermione talked about some book we needed to read to understand everything in potions.

I hated it but everytime we crossed paths, he winked at me and I couldn't help myself but start blushing. As soon as I saw his face, I saw it between my legs.

"Y/n? Are you even listening?" Hermione says and shakes me a litte at my shoulder. "What? Yeah yeah of course, I'm gonna read it." They all look at each other before their eyes are on me again. "We were actually talking about how Cormac seems to have quite interest in you." Harry then continues.

I start laughing loud, looking at them as If each of them has 3 heads." What the hell are you talking about?" "Told ya she's not listening.." Ron says, raising his eyebrows as he bites into his toast.

"I thought he‘s interested in Hermione?" I ask as my laughter calms down a bit. "Harry heard him talking about how he would - well.. do certain things to you." My amused face turns into a disgusting one as I hear what Ron says.

"Yeah and guess who‘s got an invention to Slughorn‘s dinner?" Hermione says with raised eyebrows.

Ron looks at her shoked. "What?? That prick got one and I didn‘t?"

"Oh god no.." a few days ago Harry, Hermione and myself got an invention to tonights Slughorn‘s dinner for his favorite students. ".. but wait, how do you know who‘s coming?" I ask her. "I just asked him after the last lesson of potions. It‘s Neville, Ginny, Blaise Zabini, Mattheo Riddle, Corma –" "Mattheo Riddle?" I ask her shocked, looking at her with wide eyes.

I would see him again? Like.. this close and with people around us? My mind is racing as Hermione answers. "Yeah well, you know he‘s really smart and good in potions." "And he has an interest in special students and Mattheo is.. well – special." Harry comments.

Ron snorts and talks with a full mouth. "Mh yeaw hiff fatha was "speschal".

Hermione rolls his eyes at his full mouth and looks at me again. "Why are you so suprised by his name?" she asks me a little suspicious. " oh uh- just suprised, i always thought Mattheo is uh - not interested in things like that."

"Why would chou think about wat Mattheo is-" "Ron just eat and shut up!" I snap at him making the other two widen their eyes a bit.

I collect my things and stand up from the table. "I‘m gonna go to.. god i don‘t know I‘m gonna go." I say, walking off before they can answer. Because it‘s the weekend I luckily don‘t have classes today. I don‘t think I could concentrate in one of them after the information I just got. God why him? Why me? Maybe I can say I feel sick.. no he would know. I can‘t back down.

I walk down a hall, not thinking where I am going and suddenly crash into something hard but not as hard as a wall. My book and writing stuff falls to the ground and I look up, staring right into the face of Mattheo.

My brain went blank in this monent. "What princess? Aren‘t you happy to see me?" he grins down at me before he gets down and picks up my stuff. "Hm I remember a similar moment, same position." He smiles even more when he sees my red cheeks and not talking mouth. As he gives me my stuff he presses his mouth to my ear and whispers "I‘m looking forward to tonight" And with that, he‘s gone.

I‘m so fucked.

— at the evening —

" Do you know what you‘re wearing?" I ask Hermione while I put on some makeup. I hear her sigh and she goes "yeah I have this one dress I really like. What about you?" I shake my head as I search for my lipliner. " Not really, but I have enough dresses so I‘ll find something." Hermione laughs at my comment as she pulls out her dress and changes into it.

After I‘m done with my makeup and hair, I walk over to my closet, looking for a nice dress.

"What about this one? It would fit perfectly for the occasion." She says as she pulls out a dress of mine. It is long and black, with cute little arms on it. "It‘s pretty but I want something.. else." As i go trough my clothes I think about Mattheo again and what would impress him. God I need to stop it.

"Well what are you looking for?" "Hmm something likeee.. this." It‘s perfect. It‘s short but not too short, i know it sits beautifully on me and.. it‘s green.

(imagine something like this but in some green tone and longer so it‘s more school approved)

Hermione raises her eyebrows and looks at me. "Are you sure? Isn‘t it a little too.. party?" I love her for how she always chose her words wisely and with a knowledge for not hurting and judging people. I know what she meant but she would never think about judging me. Even when I put my clothes on she wouldn‘t pick, she makes me feel great in them.

"Yeah, I‘m sure." I smile, putting it on. When I look into the mirror I smile even more, thinking about how Mattheo will react seeing me in it.

As the time comes we take our purses and walk outside our dorms, meeting Harry and Ron in the common room. "You both look great." Harry tells us like the gentlemen he is but Ron just scans me like a little hater and looks at me. "Isn‘t that a little too flashy?" "Ron!" Hermione hits him on the shoulder.

"Don‘t be mad at what you can‘t have Ronald." I say grinning and winking at him before I link my arm into Harry‘s with Hermione doing the same on his right side.

We walked through Hogwarts, towards the dinner and the closer we got the more my heart started beating as If I‘m running a marathon.

I open the door in front of us after taking one last deep breath and walk inside with my two friends.

Everyone was already there, seated perfectly. "Oh hello you three! I‘m so glad you made it. Please choose a seat and get comfortable." Professor Slughorn greets us. I always liked him, even tho many say he‘s a little weird sometimes but I think thats exactly what I do like about him.

As I walk towards an empty seat, I scan the table, looking at Mattheo when I found him but his eyes were already on my dress.

Quickly I look away, seeing that Cormacs eyes were on me too which made me gag a little.

But god Mattheo looks so good. He wears a simple white shirt with a black tie and black slacks. Damn what I would give to ride his thigh in these – "Y/n you‘re staring." Hermione whispers into my ear, making me realise i stared right at Mattheo, but to my suprise he‘s still looking, not breaking eye contact for a second.

I gulp and look away, feeling my cheeks getting warm. God I hate it so much what kind of affect he has on me. I can‘t be the only one..

Wait. I‘m a woman. I can definitely tease him and make him feel the same.

The dinner goes on, nothing special besides Ginny who came in crying. Definitely have to ask her with Hermione about that later in detail.

As desert comes I look around the table, meeting Cormacs eyes. He licks of some ice cream from his fingers and wiggles his eybrows at me. Oh god I think I‘m gonna throw up.

As soon as I can I look away to Mattheo who was giving Cormac one of his death stares. Interesting.

I don‘t really know why i think it‘s a good idea but i do think it is. So I lean back a little, presenting the low cut at the front of my chest. I see Mattheo‘s eyes flicker to my chest and so do Cormac‘s but Mattheo‘s eyes switch back really fast to Cormac and give him a second glare. Really interesting.

I smile triumphal and lean a bit forwards again, pressing my boobs together this time. Instantly I get a headache but a really intense one. I hiss in pain which makes Harry look at me worried. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah I just got an really bad headache.“ i whisper back, wondering what it caused.

Soon the dinner was over and everyone thanked Slughorn for the invitation. "I‘ll stay and try to figure out what that missing memory of Slughorn‘s is." Harry whispers to us before staying behind.

My headache got a bit better but It still didn‘t go away. As we walked trough the door I said to Hermione and Ginny "You guys go to the common room, I‘ll follow. I just wanna get some advil from Miss Pomfrey.“ They nod and tell me that they will go into Ginny‘s room to talk more privately.

It‘s already late and a bit after curfew but Professor Slughorn told us he made sure we would get in no trouble If someone sees us.

I rub my head slighty, trying to ease the pain on my way but nothing helped.

Then, out if nowhere a hand slaps over my mouth and a arm wraps around me, pressing me against a body. I scream into the hand, trying to get myself free until I see who the hand and arm belongs to.

"You didn‘t think I would let you go off that easily in that little dress of yours huh?“ Mattheo breathes against my face as it was only a few inches away from mine.

He slowly takes his hand away from my mouth, letting me speak. "What do you mean?" I ask and try the innocent act but he doesn‘t buy it.

"Oh princess, princess, princess. You can‘t fool me. I know that you wore this excuse of an dress for me. Fuck and also in my house color's? That‘s no fucking coincidence."

I gulp at his words and the fact that he knows who I wore it for. There‘s not even a single chance for me to lie. "And what If I did wore it for someone else?" Only one way and that‘s to push his last buttons. Oh how I wanted to push that buttons until –

"Someone else, yeah? Then who was it for?" "Cormac." As soon as his name left my mouth I regretted it. I see his jaw clenching and his grin fading. "Cormac yeah? So you didn‘t thought about me the whole dinner?" I slowly shake my head no, not daring to move now.

"So you‘re wet for him right now? Not me?" "What? I‘m not–" but as soon as I move my legs I feel it too. Shit. When I only look up at him his grin comes back.

"Yeah that‘s what I thought.. so why don‘t we skip this bullshit and you come with me?" Before I can even answer him, he takes my hand and pulls me trough the corridors, towards the Slytherin common room. " Mattheo I can't-" "Shut up." he hisses and whispers something under his breath so the doors to his common room would open.

"Can't fucking believe you pulled such a show in front of that stupid dick." he growled quietly before we reach his dorm. I start smiling as I see he's getting mad at the fact that Cormac saw me in that dress. "T'fuck you smiling about huh?"

As we enter his room I notice that there is only one bed which makes me wonder. "Don't you have a roommate?" "No, I have my own room." I scoff at his answer and look around his room. It has a big bed beside the window of the room and a little nightstand beside it. On the other side of the room is a big couch and a armchair.

But before I could think about it any further, he pulls me into his lap, face towards his, after he sat down on the armchair. "You know, you could have just told me If you missed me princess. Didn't need to dress all up for me." He puts his hands on my hips, grabbing them tightly.

I roll my eyes at him and act as If I didn't already enjoy his touch. "Didn't miss you." I say, looking away from him. He chuckles and pulls my face back to his with his fingers on my chin. "Are you sure?" I only nod and look into his brown eyes. They look so dark without any light in the room, that they send even more shivers down my spine than usual.

"Is your head better? Still in any pain?" he asks me grinning. "Yeah they-" wait. I never told him about my headache. Or could he hear when I told Hermione and Ginny? Or when Harry asked me at dinner?

His hands slowly wander down to my tights were my dress slowly rose up and placed them there, squeezing my flesh lightly. I felt his breath on my neck, giving me goosebumps. "It's gotten better, right?" he asks again. His lips ghosted over my skin, making me bite my lip.

"How do you know?" I ask him in a whisper. "I know everything that goes through your pretty little mind baby."

I tried to figure out what he meant by that but I couldn't concentrate with his hands on my skin and his lips almost against my neck. I need him so much.

"What baby, can't concentrate? Too much for you already?" he coos and finally kisses my neck, nibbling on the skin between his lips.

I can't believe how easy he gets under my skin with his kisses and whispers, not even doing anything. " I know you dreamed about me these last two weeks, thought about me at every chance you got. In class, in the shower, wishing it was me who touched you." he groaned against my throat.

My eyebrows squeeze together at his words. " How would you know that?" "Did you never wonder why your head always hurted at the same times?" I gasp and pull my neck away from him. " Are you reading my mind?" my eyes go wide as he just smiles at me sheepishly. Oh my god, no. This can't be. He's not allowed to know all these private thoughts.

"You don't know how hard it was for me to stay away and wait until you would come back to me but you little minx didn't and after tonight.. I couldn't just let you slip away from me again."

"Y-you can't do that Mattheo. That's not allowed. These are my thoughts." "I know baby but I couldn't help myself after that night in the shower. You were like a dream coming true so submissive and responsive to me. Fuck I'm already getting hard just thinking about it. But you understand I didn't have a chance, right? I couldn't risk you thinking about someone else then me."

He slowly pulled my dress up, exposing my tights and underwear. "God are you for real? Did you plan this?" he groans as he sees my matching set, a dark green lingerie set.

He pulls me closer to him, looking deep into my eyes.

"Ride my thigh." he commands and puts his hands back on my hips. "What?" I ask, looking at him dumbfounded. " It's my thigh or nothing. I'm not helping you getting off this time." I look at him with my mouth hanging open in shock. How could he be so cruel?

"C'mon, ride it baby I know you thought about it at dinner." My cheeks got red as he mentioned that. He dips his head towards my neck again and starts covering it in wet kisses. "Don't test my patience, love." he whispers and tightens his grip on my hips, moving them slowly. I gasp at the sudden friction.

"Feels good, right?" I only nod, closing my eyes as I start to move my hips in circles against his thigh. I feel so dirty doing this but at the same time it feels so good to finally get the friction I needed the last weeks again.

I feel my clit rubbing against my underwear, making me whimper and move my hips faster. "Fuck, look at you. I thought you were desperate back in the shower but now you're just getting yourself off on my thigh like a dirty little whore." I moaned at his words combined with his kisses on my skin. His lips went lower, first towards my collarbones, then further down to my chest.

I feel one hand of him wander to my underwear and pushing it to the side so my bare pussy rubbed against the material of his pants. I whine at the feeling, my hands grabbing his broad shoulders. " Oh my god. I'm so close Mattheo." He laughs wickedly against my chest, pushing down my dress so it hangs at the middle of my body. His mouth wanders to my bra, unclasping it with one hand behind my back.

"You're so beautiful baby, never ever am I waiting two weeks again for that." he growls and starts massaging my boobs and playing with my sensitive nipples.

I arch my back, shivers run down my spine at his touch. The grinding get's more and more intense. "Feel this?" he asks as he takes my hand and puts it on his bulge. "It's just for you." I bite my lip and look down at my hand. It looks so painful that I start massaging it through his pants. He bucks his hips up into my touch, his breathing getting heavier.

While still riding his thigh, I open his pants and push them down together with his boxershorts. His already fully hard cock slaps against his stomach before I take him into my hand. I spread the pre-cum over his tip with my thumb and start moving my hand up and down. "Shit princess.." he hisses, thrusting his hips up into my hand.

"I'm so close Mattheo.." I whine as I almost start rutting my hips against him. "Come on my leg baby, do it." he groans, lips apart.

I let go of his cock for a moment to dig my nails into his shoulders for support as I press my throbbing clit harder against him. He takes his cock into his hand and jerks himself off as he watches me panting and moaning.

With a deep twisting feeling in my stomach I come all over his thigh, riding out my orgasm.

"So good for me, look at how much you came." he says and I look down at his pants, a big wet spot on them now. My legs still shake from my high and I look up at him again.

Mattheo's POV:

Fuck. I don't know what it is but I have a feeling that this girl is going to be the death of me. With hooded eyes she looks up at me and almost get's me to cum in my own hand just from her eyes looking into mine. She had such a chokehold on me, but I will never admit that to her.

I smile down at her before I speak "already fucked out again and I didn't even touched you." The same thing I told her two weeks ago after I've eaten her pussy and she came after 3 minutes.

"Fuck off." she mumbles and falls slightly against my chest. "As much as I enjoy this closeness baby.." I start, nodding towards my rock hard cock, laying against my stomach.

I push a strand of hair behind her ear and whisper into it. " Suck on it." Her eyes go wide and she looks down on me with those innocent eyes again. " Don't tell me you never sucked cock with those pretty lips." I say, looking at her plump lips, almost begging to be fucked.

She rolls her eyes at me again, making me want to choke her until she stops. " I have." Her answer makes my clench my jaw, wishing she would've just said she didn't.

I pushed her down in front of my legs. I grab a pillow from the couch beside us and put it under her knees, making her grin. " Don't tell me you suddenly care for me Matty?" Now I am the one who rolls his eyes.

I grab her pretty hair into a ponytail and push her towards my cock. She takes it into her hand and starts to lick off the pre-cum from my tip. A moment later she starts sucking on my tip, making me smile. I have a feeling this is going to be good.

I hiss as her wet lips and warm mouth take more of my cock into her mouth. I close my eyes and let my head hang backwards. " Come on y/n, show me what you got."

Suddenly she takes me all the way down her throat, my eyes almost bulging out of my head and my mouth falling open. "Oh fuck, yeah!" I groan, gritting my teeth together. I swear I could feel her smile around me.

She bobs her head up and down in a fast pace, making me moan and groan like a little bitch. Fuck, what is it with this girl?

I feel my tip hitting the back of her throat. " Oh Shit." I lift my head up to look down at her. Her eyes are teary and her hands support herself on my tights. I start grinning, wishing I could take a picture of her pretty mouth around me.

Her throat clenches around me so delicious I almost came. "Hmm baby, you know how to suck cock. Gonna give you that." I pant.

One of her hands go down to my balls, massaging them. " Oh - " I throw my head back again, feeling something in my lower stomach. My hips buck up and I hear her gag, only getting me closer to my high. "M' gonna cum down your throat and you'll swallow it, yeah?" I ask her, breathing heavy. It doesn't take me long to cum and fill her mouth. "Fuckkk.." I groan, pushing her down even harder so her nose touches my stomach.

"Swallow it. All of it." I slowly let go of her, but seeing her cough a little only fuels my desire. She opens her mouth after she swallows and shows me that she swallowed every single drop.

"That's a good girl. Now come on.. let's take a shower." I say grinning at her and helping her back up. "Mattheo I don't know If I can walk so far." she sighs as she stands on her still shaky legs.

I kiss the top of her head, something I never do but just feels right with her. " You don't have to. I have my own shower." I pick her up bridal style and carry her towards my bathroom."

Y/n's POV:

As he picks me up to carry me, I feel a few butterfly's in my stomach but I try to suppress them.

He let's me down when we stand under his shower. His clothes hit the floor. "Hot or cold?" he ask, putting his hand on the tap. "Hot." I say and watch his back. Last time I didn't noticed but he has big scars all over his back, some even on his chest. He must see my face cause he asks me "What's wrong?" I shake my head and try to smile.

"Nothing." I see it in his eyes that he doesn't buy my lie but doesn't push me either. As the warm water hits my skin, I sigh in relief. I let my hair get wet and wash off the makeup I had on. While I did so, Mattheo stands right behind me, his hands on my hips, scanning my face.

I open my eyes and see him looking. " What?" I ask grinning. " You're beautiful." I roll my eyes and look away again, trying to hide my blush. "You don't have to try to get into my pants. You already are." He turns me around and holds my face. " Hey.. I really mean it. And not just your body. Your face is prettier than the ones of angels." My eyes widen at his words, not expecting that kind of words from him.

He clears his throat and looks away for a moment himself. That's when I grab his face in both my hands and crash my lips into his. The kiss is hungry, more passionate and different than the last times. More tender.

One of his hands slide up and down my back, while the other lays on my hip. "You make me crazy, princess." he admits, mumbling against my lips. I smile into the kiss. "Don't go soft Mattheo." I say, teasing him.

He starts kissing my neck, but less soft and more aggressively now. "Remember who's in charge here baby. I would choose your words wisely." He lifts me up so I wrap my legs around his waist. "This time I wanna see your face when I fuck you."

He takes his cock into his hand and positions it at my entrance, teasing me with it. „Mattheo come on, fuck me.." i huff out frustrated. "Beg for it, wanna hear you beg again like the last time I fucked you." I roll my eyes at his ego, but still do as he tells me to. "Please, I'm already begging you to fuck me."

Ge grins down at me and slowly pushes inside me, holding eye contact the whole time. His lips part and his eyes get lazy. "Fuck, you feel just as good as the first time I fucked you stupid."

I want to bite back but only bite my lip as he starts thrusting in a fast and hard pace. "What was that? I'm going soft princess?" His grip on my hips gets tighter and he starts kissing my neck up and down. " N-no you're not.." I whimper, closing my eyes and letting my head fall back against the wall.

What was is that he had me under his control so much? Not even a single brain cell told me to not do as he says. I can't with this boy..

His lips work their way up to my ear and he whispers "I'm a man baby, a boy wouldn't fuck you like I do. " Goosebumps erupt over my body and again he's right. " Stop messing around in my head." I growl lightly, supressing a moan in my throat. "You're all mine. I don't give a shit about how you see that, cause I know your body screams for mine every night. And it will never get someone else's. Do you understand?"

He stops kissing my neck and looks at me while thrusting his hips against mine. A shiver run down my spine as I looked into his eyes, but this time not a good one. It was ice cold. I never saw him looking tat serious and cold. Possesive. "Do. You. Under. Stand." he asks me again, deep and hard thrust for every word.

"God yes, Mattheo. I understand!" I cry out as his fingers find their way towards my clit, rubbing it in circles. My nails leave marks all over his back, drawing a little blood.

He starts hissing but laughing at the same time at the pain. He's gonna be the death of me. "No, you're gonna be mine, princess. Do that again with your nails, turns me on." As I don't, he mumbles a quite "okay" and presses me harder against the shower wall, fucking me even deeper and more brutal. My nails find their way back inside his skin and I'm sure If we had been o the bed It would be broken by now.

"When are you gonna learn to not be a little brat, huh?" he asks, a smirk on his face. "I own you now, baby." I let out half a snort half a chuckle. " Do I own you then too?" I ask sarcastically. " You own every inch of me."

My face falls a little at his answer, not expecting it. Did he mean that?But as soon as my thoughts started, I forgot them as he starts to rub my clit even harder, but in a steady rhythm.

"Oh yeah look at that in pleasure twisting face, that's fucking it." he groans, his thrust becoming more erratic. One hand leaves my hip and wraps itself around my throat, squeezing it with the perfect amount of pressure. A broken scream leaves my lips with my eyes rolling back.

"Yeah scream so loud Cormac hears who‘s name you‘re moaning tonight." I press my lips together but he squeezes my throat tighter. My walls clench around him, making him lose his control, eyes rolling back a bit with a smile to it. "I love that pussy so much fuck.I bet he can't fuck you like I can, huh?"

This time my answer comes in a instant. " No- no he can't. I'm so close Mattheo, please." I moan as I feel this deep twisting feeling in my stomach. His lips meet mine, to my surprise. Unlike how he fucks, he kisses me soft and passionate. "Come around me baby.Please fucking come around me." he groans almost desperate.

And just like that I let go and let the feeling of my orgasm overflow me. "Hm shit.. can I come inside you baby?" Mattheo pants against my lips while he looks down between us. I just nod quickly, feeling him coming inside me a few seconds later. "Shit.." a whimper leaves his lips as he fills me up.

My stomach twists again at the sound so I look at him and scan his face for a moment. I think that's the hottest sound my ears ever came across. He looks fucked out too, his eyes heavy.

He slowly pulls out but still holds me. "You make me so addicted." he confesses to me, looking between my eyes and lips. I had to. " So you're going soft now again?" I tease him, out of breath.

He chuckles lowly which ends with me bent over every single surface in his room.

I don't know how long I can survive in that.

—

I just know ya‘ll hate and love me for posting this.. after weeks :) <3

There‘s gonna be a part 3, the final then. Hehe.

Taglist: @idk-simra @kindnessspreads @purplegardenwhispers @glittervame @oxi8 @lovelyygirl8 @yakosobaboba | thank you for supporting guys 🫶🏻

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xoxo sarah <3

#slytherin boys #slytherin imagine #slytherin smut #harry potter imagine #sub mattheo riddle #mattheo riddle masterlist #mattheo riddle blurb #mattheo riddle x you #mattheo riddle headcanon #mattheo riddle fluff #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle imagine #mattheo riddle #mattheo riddle smut

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slitherpunk · 8 months ago

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games i liked in 2023 (And Other)

I like games ! You know that ?! and I played a lot 2023! and I liked a lot :). They aren't in any specific order, it's just a little highlight of games that stood out to me this year. I've attempted to write a few thoughts on each so I hope take a look. I wrote playtimes for some also but that is very subjective.

-Ones that actually came out 2023-

Lunacid https://store.steampowered.com/app/1745510/Lunacid/ I think I mentioned enjoying this in 2022 but it officially released so I can say it was one of my favorite games in 2023 :3! I like to feel around this game's walls for secrets. I like the npcs that are full of hope and whimsy despite the bleakness of its world. Chill and occasionally spooky first person dungeon crawling around moody caverns and ruins varying from underground forests to vampire castles and blood lake. (Blood lake!!!! Lake of blood!!! Big creature there.) Lots of fun weapons and spells to find, I like the one that lets you turn blood into coffins.

~20 hours

Orbo's Odyssey https://feverdreamjohnny.itch.io/orbos-odyssey If you played the massively popular demo for "Peeb Adventures" by feverdreamjohnny then you know that Johnny makes some fun and funny games and this is certainly one of them. speedy and satisfying platforming! funny dracula moments! short and sweet.

~2 hours

A Walk in the Woods https://mooncaller.itch.io/a-walk-in-the-woods Quaint little GBStudio game :) Made by some friends of mine for a jam :) It's cute I like it. There's minigames where you catch bugs and birdwatch.

~30 minutes long

Undertale Yellow https://gamejolt.com/games/UndertaleYellow/136925 I've only completed the pacifist run and checked out a neutral run so far. as the title somewhat implies, this is a prequel to Undertale where you play as the fallen human who had the yellow colored soul. This Undertale fangame has a lot of charm!!! A lot of battles really feel like they could have been in the original, with quite a bit of extra flair in some circumstances.

~10 hours

vs really cool bird https://bobacupcake.itch.io/vs-really-cool-bird you know that really cool bird that rob bobacupcake made well you can fight it in undertale and it's really fun. yeah two undertale fangames. . . wat of it …

~30 minutes

Misericorde: Volume One https://xeecee.itch.io/misericorde I wont lie the main draw for me into this was cute anime nuns I sure didn't know a whole lot else about it when I dug into it. But it's (the first part of) a VN murder mystery! And I enjoyed it a whole lot. All the characters are memorable and I really enjoy how all of them have differentiating designs. The protagonist is so failgirl. She sucks so much and I love her. I'm very intrigued by the mechanics of the game's world, it clues you in near the beginning to expect something a bit supernatural/fantastical, which gives you (and later the protagonist) a curiosity about what's real and what isn't. The music is all very impressive too, with the ost reaching past 100 tracks varying through post-rock, folk, drum & bass, and others. (Remembering when the track "Scandal" played and my friends and I took a moment to be like- okay hang on this track pwns.) Big fan of its haunting locals and how the aesthetic of the game fits them well. Also the humor is a lot of fun, and I love all the moments getting to know the different characters. Very excited to see the eventual continuation of this.

~12 hours

Absolutely Perfect Specimen https://chambersoft.itch.io/absolutely-perfect-specimen It seems like a lot of people are craving toxic horror yuri lately. Here's a recommendation. It's a VN about the android maid "Pan" and the mad scientist girl who created her. Horrifying & gut wrenching & largely about having other people define you. The art and music is haunting & poignant and matches the ever increasing feeling of dread throughout. It's yuri with the chunks. Peak robotgirl horror for those who can stomach it.

~90 minutes

Wordhopper https://kokoscript.itch.io/wordhopper Very quaint word search type puzzle game for ms dos! I think its style is very slick and that's pretty impressive to see. Chill game with nice vibes and eyecandy visuals. also it was so cool to have played this and then ended up seeing the dev's booth at Vintage Computer Festival Midwest. I was like omg woah I just played this.

~bunny

Bossgame https://lilyv.itch.io/bossgame This game is yuriful as f*ck. Delightful humor and fun character dynamics! A simple-to-understand-difficult-to-master boss rush battle system that makes you satisfied to get it right, and enticing to get just a little farther if you get it wrong. There's a lot of detail and charm to this game's menus and dialogues and win screens, I remember noticing that once you beat a boss there would be some marquee text that would pass by with some prose on it. I love how it balances its silly moments with its heartfelt moments and its high octane moments. I like the character development and revelations had throughout the plot. & I like how good the protagonists are for each other :) It's very sweet. It's hype as hell. if you want some boss rush action paired well with that sweet sweet girl's love, you *will* play this game.

~5 hours

Elly's Adventure https://bikwins.itch.io/ellys-adventure Very cute and witchy!! You are the little witch girl "Elly" on an adventure to get your toys back!! Feels like a pretty authentic gameboy type experience, it takes a lot of design cues from Kirby's adventure and the like. I am a big fan of how playful it feels.

~1 hour

Nour https://store.steampowered.com/app/1141050/Nour_Play_with_Your_Food/ This was a treat for me, but I understand that not everybody is going to get it. It's a game where you play with food(and food accessories). And that's it. It knows what it was going for. I think a lot of people were expecting something else for some reason. It's a cute little toy game and I felt satisfied with my time with it.

~food

Hi-Fi Rush https://store.steampowered.com/app/1817230/HiFi_RUSH/ Do I have to say this game is super fun? It's a big one everybody probably already knows it. This game's dopey humor made me laugh a lot and I'm not afraid to admit it.

~12 hours

WHISKEY.ST2007S https://bonicle.itch.io/whiskey-st2007nes One of the last games I played in the year because it released super last minute. Does anybody else get a rush when running a shopping cart down the parking lot? This emulates that feeling. Short game where you collect whisky stones in the whisky stone dimension because you forgot to go christmas shopping until the very last minute. it rules. It's very short you can go play it right now & get a highscore.

~5 minutes

re:curse https://devpalmer.itch.io/re-curse Discovered this one near the very end of the year also. Fun little rpg maker horror/humor game about a weird scientist lady, her butch, and an evil clown computer virus that figured out how to warp reality. I got a kick out of it. and also enjoyed digging through the game's files, which was actively encouraged by the dev, which I thought was very fun.

~90 minutes

-Didn't technically get to until 2024 but released last year-

SWOLLEN TO BURSTING UNTIL I AM DISAPPEARING ON PURPOSE https://1207.itch.io/swollen-to-bursting-until-i-am-disappearing-on-purpose People love to dunk on a lot of indie rpgs for being "quirky Earthbound inspired and about depression" or whatever. Earthbound's great. If people can nail the kind of humor and absurdity it likes to pull off while also balancing difficult topics I think that deserves a high mark. SWOLLEN TO BURSTING was fun. Bizarre and charming places to explore & distressing secrets to find. I like how it blends meander-around-the-town gameplay with Yume Nikki sort of exploration and effects. Also I'm a big fan of the music. I like how it has the lofi sound which matches the early 3d look of the game.

~6 hours

HalOPE https://starbage.itch.io/halope Another for the fans of sweet little rpg maker games that have a lot of heart. HalOPE is about an incomplete little angel wondering through worlds. Each has a theme, usually to do with an emotion or feeling, and they do well at evoking that feeling as well as its antithesis. a lot of the music is very homey and charming at moments and unnerving at others, sometimes lonely, all doing well in their corresponding chapters to further the feeling of its specified theme. There are so many delightful characters and designs in this & I found myself feeling really attached to their tiny little stories. The narrative at the core of it all hit me. If I may be vulnerable, I cried a whole lot at various moments in this game. It was really cathartic. I feel very excited for people to experience this game.

~5 hours

-Favs I finally got around to that didn't come out 2023-

An Outcry https://quinnk.itch.io/an-outcry Kind of sad it took me so long to get to this one, but glad it meant I got to play the "definitive" updated version of it. Apartment wandering RPG maker horror. Bum smokes from your neighbors and use them to save the game. I wish I could unwrap a lot more of what I like about this game than I can without spoiling too much. But if I could, I'd probably go on for too long. Let me attempt to be succinct & not giving too much away. You can tell pretty early on that An Outcry is about taking action when necessary & not turning a blind eye. What it explores about player vs protagonist agency is very fascinating to me as well, and I enjoyed learning about the inspirations for why the game's narrative works the way it does. The character Anne is such a sweetie and I love her a whole lot. This game has a very tangible feeling, this apartment complex is dirty and crumby, it smells of smoke, and there's a surrounding desperation you can feel.

~5 hours

Pigments https://punkcake.itch.io/pigments Honestly I had gotten this game in a bundle and while I was playing it I hadn't looked at the name and I just kept calling it FRUIT. On call with my friends I'd be like "hey im gonna play more FRUIT". I straight up didn't read the title screen. But it's called Pigments. You play as a fruit and you try to paint the whole floor and not get sliced by buzzsaws. Fun little arcade type game.

~fruit

Bridge, October 3rd https://lowpolis.itch.io/bridge-october-3rd Very short vignette. I like it. It's what it says it is. I'm not going to overexplain.

~like a minute

-Other Games I Want To Mention-

Pseudoregalia https://store.steampowered.com/app/2365810/Pseudoregalia/ I think a lot of people might have already known this one but I felt like it was a pretty fun 3d platformer. There were a few issues I had with it (boss fight at the beginning was frustrating, and I got lost a lot [but it looks like there's been a map patch by now, so, perhaps for some that is a fix]). I enjoyed it but sure felt weird that the only accessibility option was to give the protagonist pants. What kind of joke is that?

~5 hours

Mushroom Musume https://mortallymoonstruckgames.itch.io/mushroom-musume (Disclaimer, this game is still early access, but I saw a lot of people talking about it last year. SO I will mention here?) Haven't played much of this yet, but I have enjoyed what I played so far!! As of writing I've gone through 6 playthroughs, I feel like I've hardly scratched the surface and I've been so impressed by its depth. It's very charming, you never know what sorts of fairytale shenanigans are going to happen, and it's very cool to see how your different stats will affect things. It very much plays out like a roguelike vn. Which is not the sort of thing you may expect to make much sense but it pulls this off well. Also all the mushroom girls are very cute and I love them very much. I hope the sad goopy one who had bugs in her skin rests in peace.

~mushroom

Knuckle Sandwich https://andybrophy.itch.io/knuckle-sandwich -_- Hm. Where do I start with this one. I was pretty excited for this one since the demo and kickstarter in 2018. I felt like the demo was a hell of a hook that got me curious & horrified. As time went on, it seemed to be shaping up into something really cool. turn based combat with action commands and wario-ware-type microgames?? with a banging soundtrack?? like, count me in!! Then it released and well, the gameplay, art, music all delivered. It was very fun and engaging in those aspects. But the story… oh it just devolves into disappointing nonsensical randomness. The whole hook at the beginning seemed to be completely thrown away for the wild goose chase plot that ensues, leaving you to wonder if it was ever going to be relevant again. It felt like it had no idea what it was trying to say or do. It disappointed me that a game that has so much good in so much else about it gets brought down so much for me by this plot.

~12 hours

Rhythm Doctor https://store.steampowered.com/app/774181/Rhythm_Doctor/ (Putting this one in mentions because it is early access.) I really enjoyed the act 5 release. When I first saw this game, I kind of shrugged it off, thinking "that base mechanic doesn't seem like it will last". I thought it was basically just that one ghost shooting game from Rhythm Heaven which I Hate. Well let's just say I am now seeking penitence for my previous transgressions. It's really fun. There's a lot more to it that I didn't know when I first took a look. Also, consistently amazed by people's custom levels, I had no idea that its level editor allows people to do so much in it, I look at some levels and think "This editor seems as complex as an industry standard video editor". I'm looking forward to what they're planning next, very curious how they could possibly one-up the last update.

~rhythm

El Paso Elsewhere https://strangescaffold.itch.io/el-paso-elsewhere This was really fun & funny so far but unfortunately I had been encountering an issue with a certain level where the game would crash. I reported the issue, got a response, and there has been an update since then so I think there's a possibility that it got fixed but I have not tried yet. I would like to return to this sometime but having to relearn controls midway through is always daunting to me.

-Things that looked good but didn't get around to-

Cosmic Wheel Sisterhood https://store.steampowered.com/app/1340480/The_Cosmic_Wheel_Sisterhood/ Still don't know a whole lot about this. But there are witches, and I like witches.

Casette Beasts https://store.steampowered.com/app/1321440/Cassette_Beasts/ I haven't felt thrilled about Pokémon lately. I know a lot of people seemed to really enjoy this little monster-collecting-rpg. The style is appealing to me as a die-hard gen 5 fan. I started playing it but haven't set aside the dedicated time for it yet, but I'm excited to dig in more when I do.

Little Goody Two Shoes https://store.steampowered.com/app/1812370/Little_Goody_Two_Shoes/ Started watching a friend play this, and I'm certainly curious.. Some sort of horror fairytale but also there's yuri? Yum. Enjoyed the style and animation in the nightmare segments that I saw.

Venba https://store.steampowered.com/app/1491670/Venba/ I've picked this up a while ago but still haven't gotten around to it, but I'm eager to, I've heard nothing but good things.

Goodbye Volcano High https://store.steampowered.com/app/1310330/Goodbye_Volcano_High/ I think there are gay dinosaurs in a band and it's going to be the apocalypse? I have also heard nothing but good things about this.

-Things I watched friends play-

Signalis https://store.steampowered.com/app/1262350/SIGNALIS/ This was a pretty big one. You probably already know it, right? Watched a friend play this and I missed various parts but I understood a solid bit of it. hey. robotgirls are always getting put in these fucked up situations. have you noticed this? one time i got really high and cried about it. it isn't fair

Bomb Rush Cyberfunk https://store.steampowered.com/app/1353230/Bomb_Rush_Cyberfunk/ This one was also probably big enough you don't need me to sing its praises. but it looked really neat. swag.

-Various Thoughts-

Lately I've been thinking more about design and narrative. I feel like I haven't been doing as much analysis as I should be when it comes to games. I want to dissect more what games are saying and figure out meaning. Also attempt to see how the mechanics aid in that. I feel like most of my own work is pretty abstract & random. I simply make what I like. While that's fun and all, I still want to improve in a lot of ways, especially in having more of a theme or message. Figuring out how other games accomplish this is obviously a good step toward this.

If you saw games here that interest you I highly urge you to take a look, many are pretty short, and I pretty explicitly wanted to highlight some smaller titles. If you know me you know I like to uplift small games. (Save for the occasional big game, but that's rare these days) I think it's healthy for you to play and support independently developed & published works. I don't want to ramble too much this time about why that's important, but I hope that you might have found something you may enjoy here and if not then I encourage you to find small stuff that you would like. And I would like to encourage everybody to share their findings as well! Little games need our help to be seen and talked about! They don't have the budgets the big ones do for advertising, and advertising on your own is a whole ton of work. If you like something, spread the word! I'm sure the developers would very much appreciate that.

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mochinomnoms · 24 days ago

Note

hrng… trey birthday fic…

I’m not gonna lie, for awhile, I didn’t really like trey. i didn’t dislike him, mind you, but he was just kind of there. but all of a sudden, my brain was just thinkin about trey. like i’m just chillin at home, and i’m just thinking about trey. he’s just so…

and then you posted the birthday fic and godDAMN

Mochi, you are a genius. I am a buff trey truther. mans would have hella arm muscle and I will not accept any less. sorry i just keep thinking about trey now. he would have the biggest breeding kink its not even funny

anyhow, if you have more trey I would LOVE to read it especially if it’s about him being a pervert

i’m so normal i promise

as always, have a wonderful day ^^

-🦷

AAAAAA TY!!! I'm so glad that you're seeing the appeal for Trey he really is an underrated character!! I got that eldest daughter syndrome and Trey as a character feeds into that ngl.

I also had a crush on Peeta from The Hunger Games when I was a kid and I was remembering a bit where it was pointed out that as a baker, Peeta was actually hella strong (he could toss 100 lbs flour bags over his shoulder), so it would only make sense to me that Trey would be similar.

I image he would have a bit more of a sleeper build, so it's not obvious how strong he is until he's actually doing something physical (like fucking me—). None of the sprites do him justice in that regard, but this very specific panel from the manga does do things to me:

aaaaaaaaa big strong arms to hold you in~

Trey is also kinda silly in the fact that he canonically is really bad at flirting, or at the every least being suave/romantic. Poor ghost bride, getting her eyes compared to grapes...

He did say that it was cause he was put on the spot, which is partially true. I like to think that he's the type to just say something flirty or romantic without meaning to.

Think of an old married couple where one of them will casually drop a compliment like it's the most natural thing in the world. That's how Trey is, and he doesn't even realize it! It's very sweet, and it's very easy to fall for of course!

I, of course, have other thots as well tehehe~

He absolutely has the biggest breeding kink (no this isn't just copy and pasting my own kinks into my favs, wat you talking about?). He grew up with a happy family, and had a bit of a taste of what parenthood is like while taking care of his siblings.

He wants to replicate that for his own family, no doubt, but it's not exactly those reasons that he's so into breeding you. No, it's the, forgive him for the silly comparison, look of your hole absolutely stuffed like a éclair (which I've seen several people on here ask of him YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE).

The sight of you swollen, twitchy, and full hole is sooooosososososoooooo yummy, and he has the excuse that he has to make sure his seed will take to keep filling you! It's not until after when your belly is swelling with a baby that his pregnancy kink kicks in...but perhaps that's another discussion for another time.

My last thoughts for just this moment are that Trey maaaay have a slight bit of an oral fixation. He likes seeing your mouth on his dick, he likes to open your lips with his cum still resting on your tongue and running his fingers over your teeth, and he reeaaally likes to have you bite down on his neck and admire the teeth marks. Not enough to bleed, mind you, but enough that he could take a picture and then compare the marks to your actual teeth later on in fascination. It's only a little weird, indulge him won't you?

#mochi asks #�� anon #twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #trey clover #trey clover x reader #highly suggestive #!breeding kink #!pregnancy kink #!oral fixation

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homiesexuallaj · 2 months ago

Text

Red Ginseng

Pairing: The Mandalorian/Din Djarin x reader

Warnings/Genre: a sex pollen fic <3, porn with plot, foreplay, semi-heavy petting, fingering (fem receiving), unprotected p in v (non recommended), fluff, smut, size kink if you squint, let me know if I missed anything, not proofread because I'm lazy

———

You’d worked with the Mandalorian for a few years now. What started out as some commissioned help had developed into some lifelong work. You were good with a blaster and excellent with knifes, which you assumed in the beginning was why the Mandalorian kept you around. Now, you think he keeps you around simply for the company.

The Mandalorian is a many of few words, even this long into your partnership. He prefers to shoot first, ask later. He wasn’t also too fond of physical contact. You only felt the Mandalorian’s touch when he needed to pass you through the small hallway under the cockpit of the Razor Crest. This ship really wasn’t meant for two people..

This week, or two at this point, you’d been brought along to a forest-y planet that you couldn’t remember the name of in hopes of finally catching a bounty that the Mandalorian has been hunting for about a month now. This planet was hot and sticky. Leaves, vines, and other foliage practically soaked you when you just barely brushed past a leaf. It was irritating at this point, never being dry.

You let out a loud sigh, stomping over dead leaves and slapping away wet leaves. You were soaked through your clothes. You internally cringed at pealing your leather pieces from your body tonight. Just before a complaint crawls up your throat, an arm cut you off. You looked at the Mandalorian with scrunched eyebrows and annoyed eyes.

He only gestured ahead of you with his head.

You followed the gesture, peaking between your cover of leaves.

Ahead of you, in a shady clearing, is your’s and the Mandalorian’s bounty. It was a male Gungan with burnt orange skin and green eyes. With him was a small male Neimoidian with gray skin and gold eyes. Both were huddled around a smoking campfire, and were sopping wet and obviously malnourished. Runaway life seemed to be harder than they thought.

The Mandalorian caught your attention when he moved the arm down from in front of you.

You looked up at him, waiting to tell you what to do.

He gestured to the right with his head, indicating to circle around and trap the runaways in their clearing.

You headed off and around, careful to barely brushing by foliage and tiptoe over sticks. You positioned yourself facing the back of the Neimoidian. And you watched as your companion strutted into the clearing, the leaves of his cover dripping water onto his already shiny armor.

At the sound of a breaking twig, the runaways snapped their head in the direction of the Mandalorian. They both stood quickly, looking around nervously.

“A Mandalorian!” Exclaimed the Gungan. “What a surprise!” There was obvious panic on the creature’s face. “I didn’t know Mandalorian’s resided on this planet.”

“Perhaps he can show us to a nearby village,” The neimoidian hoped.

The Mandalorian only stayed quiet, waiting for the two to get their panicky blabbering over with. Once deemed quiet for long enough, he spoke.

“Via order of the leader of the planet Naboo,” The man started. “You two have a bounty placed on your head to be brought straight back to Her Majesty’s palace.”

“We can’t go back!” The gungan exclaimed.

The Mandalorian did not react. He only started walking towards them.

The creatures panicked and ran straight for you, the only clear way out of the semi-dry clearing. You jumped out, stopping the runaways in their path. You grabbed the small Neimoidian, trying to restrain him.

His partner, the Gungan, ran straight at you. He pushed himself against you and the Neimoidian, knocking all three of you over. It was a slick battle of trying to grab and get up at the same time.

There was a high-pitched zippering sound that caught your ears and the Gungan gasped, and you watched as he was dragged from the pile and back towards your partner.

The tussle got easier again, with only you going against one. The small Neimoidian fought and squirmed, but his small stature made it an easy fight for you. You restrained him with ease, knocking him to the ground and holding him down back and arm twisted around his back and a knee across both of his legs.

You heard a battle-ish cry and looked up.

The Gungan had leapt from the ground and onto the Mandalorian. The Gungan used his bottom half to grab onto the upper half of the Mandalorian and send them both tumbling down a small hill and into some foliage. Squabbling and scrambling was heard before the Gungan crawled back up into the clearing. He took a gasp of air before there was a shot of something and he fell to the ground.

You’d thought for a moment that the Mandalorian had killed him out of frustration, which wouldn’t have been the first time.

The Mandalorian came out from the foliage, his shoulders heaving as he caught his breath. His chest place and lower left part of his helmet was covered in this sticky looking red pollen, no doubt from a flower or two. As you looked him over, you saw a blaster in his right hand.

“Only a stunner,” The Mandalorian said. “Don’t worry.”

Without another word, he pointed the stunner at the Neimoidian and shot before the creature could get in his pleas. He went limp with sleep, finally.

You both picked up your respective bounties and hauled them over your shoulders. You made your way through the foliage and towards the ship. After you figured enough time had passed for the Mandalorian to catch his breath you started talking.

“What is that stuff?” You asked, hoping he knew that you were talking about the pollen.

“Pollen from a flower I’ve never seen before,” The Mandalorian answered, his voice slightly gruff. “It got under my helmet.”

“I hope there’s no side affects to inhaling the stuff,” You wondered.

“I hope not,” Your partner sounded disgruntled.

You thought back to the time where you tripped and fell into a garden of flowers you’d never seen before. All was fine and dandy until about halfway through that job. You’d becoming loopy and tripped over your feet about every other step. There was no way you’d be able to help the Mandalorian now, so he hauled you over his shoulder, much like he’d done to the Gungan now, and brought you back to the Razor Crest. He sat you down in your bunk, which was one of two bunks in the Razor Crest, and told you very sternly to stay. And off he went.

You don’t remember what you said during that time, but you hope it was nothing too embarrassing.

Once you two arrived at the ship, the Mandalorian encased both bounties in a block of carbonate and slowly got settled into the ship for the night. The Mandalorian disappeared in the refresher to shower and clean his armor and you wandered into the shared space of yours and the Mandalorian’s impromptu shared closet/bedroom space.

It was a small nook in a semi-hidden corner in the bottom half of the Razor Crest. The only light over here was a small lamp you’d bought for the space and the dim lights from your bunks. There were shelves and racks here for clothes, towels, blankets, shoes, and other necessities.

Taking advantage of the limited time of the Mandalorian showering and cleaning his armor, you peeled off your soaked clothes and limited pieces of leather armor. It was more a struggle that it needed to be, but soon enough you were free from your uncomfortably wet prison and it was a wet pile on the ground. You changed into some looser, brown cloth pants and a large white sleeveless shirt, with some socks and a knife around your waist to accompany you. You patted your hair dry with a towel before brushing it out and picking up your wet clothes and towel. You hung the clothes on a nearby rack that was below a vent in the ship, hoping to dry them off before the day tomorrow.

You sighed, stretching a bit. The hiss of the refresher door opening caught your attention and you turned.

The Mandalorian made his way from the steaming doorway, clad in some now shiny steel armor.

“Feel better?” You asked, still observing him.

He hummed in affirmative, making his way past you and up the ladder to the cockpit.

You followed.

When you found you footing on the cold, metal floor of the cockpit, you saw that the Mandalorian was already typing in coordinates for Naboo.

“We’re not taking off already, are we?” You asked, coming up beside him to watch as he pressed buttons.

“No,” The Mandalorian answered. “But I would like to get up early and take off as soon as possible.”

“Why? Is this planet to wet for you?” You teased. “Or are there too many weird, stinky flowers.”

The Mandalorian only looked at you, before turning his attention back to the buttons so he could finish what he was doing. Once done, you noted that the armored man hobbled his way over to his captain’s chair and groaned as he sat, subtly clutching his right side.

Upon not so close inspection, you could see blood seeping out from his black flight suit and pouring over his metal belt, the black cloth damp across the ribcage on the Mandalorian’s right side.

“Mando, you can’t even take the time to stitch yourself up in the shower?” You scolded lightly.

He knew what you were talking about immediately, “It wasn’t bleeding in the shower.”

“Mando.” You scolded.

He only sighed.

“C’mon,” You gave a sigh of your own after a few heartbeats. “Let’s get you stitched up.”

You made your way down to the second level of the Razor Crest first, knowing that the Mandalorian wouldn’t have to take much convincing to follow you down.

While you dug around for a medpack, the Mandalorian sat down on a crate, awaiting your instruction.

Once you found a medpack, you drug over another crate and set that medpack on top of that, opening it and making sure it had all the supplies you needed.

“Alright, armor off,” You order around first.

The Mandalorian unclasped his chestplate and abdomen armor from his torso. Then he removed his cape, setting all pieces to the side. You did the next parts yourself.

You pushed up his shirt and slowly inched down the tight cloth he wore around his mid to lower abdomen until you had clear view of the cut that made its home on the Mandalorian’s right side.

The cut was long and jagged, looking like whatever cut him had torn its way forcefully through the layers of cloth and into the skin. The Mandalorian was lucky that whatever cut him didn’t cut him deep, but it was still needed-stitches deep.

Before continuing, you went and grabbed a washrag and wet it in the refresher’s sink before settling back down at the Mandalorian’s side and wiping off the blood that had smudged around the wound, revealing the golden skin that hid under the armor.

It wasn’t the first time seeing the Mandalorian’s skin, having needed to stitch him up a few times now, but it still caught you by surprise, especially when you could see the muscle rippling under his flesh with every move. It was still distracting, especially as the Mandalorian stretched an arm over his head so you could work with more area.

You shook your head slightly, willing away your distracted brain. After a few more wipes against the skin, all blood was gone. You grabbed a bottle of medical alcohol and damped the rag with the liquid, wiping and the dabbing the wound with that now, hoping to kill off any chance of infection. And next, the stitches. You grabbed a sterile needle from the medpack and situated a thing of thread through the eye. You glanced up at the Mandalorian, anxiety making you nervous.

“Ready?” You asked, giving the Mandalorian a few moments to compose himself.

He nodded.

The Mandalorian never really reacted when you stitched him up, but the tense muscles and the clenching of fists was the tale tell sign of discomfort and pain.

Upon the first stab of the needle, the Mandalorian sucked in a breath and you heard the squeak of leather as the Mandalorian clenched his fists.

“Breath, Mando,” You told him. “I’ll be as quick as I can.”

It was a slow process of stitching up the jagged wound, but in order to close it properly you had to take your time. Before long, you were done. You tied the stitch off and cut the thread with some small sheets you kept in the medpack. In order to keep the wound clean, you packed some firm cotton around the wound and wrapped some gauze around his abdomen to both keep out germs and hold the cotton in place. You gathered up the medical supplies and turned to put most of it back into the medpack, and threw the used and unclean stuff, like the needle, away. After getting the area situation again, you crowded into the Mandalorian’s space, checking that the gauze was tight, but not too tight.

“Okay,” You patted the Mandalorian down. “I’ll have to check the wound and change the bandages tomorrow morning.”

He nodded.

To check, you poked around the wound again, to make sure there was no excess bleeding. Upon touching a tender spot, the Mandalorian groaned and grabbed onto your waist, the closest thing for him to grab.

On instinct, you jerked your hand away and froze at the contact. A shiver erupted from the grasp and traveled outwards through your body and a hint of heat bubbled in your lower abdomen. It was still moment before your touch sense picked up on something else, how hot his hands were. Not on an attractive scale, but on a temperature scale. From the scarce touches that the Mandalorian provided you, you knew that his hands were abnormally hot. Without thinking, you reached down between the Mandalorian’s legs and placed the inside of your wrist on the man’s upper thigh, noting that the heat radiating through the pants was abnormal as well.

Full on concern, you spoke, “Mando, you’re running a temperature!”

At your words and touches, the Mandalorian adjusted his hips, dragging your attention to the tense cotton between his legs.

“Oh no! I’m so sorry!” You tore your hand away from his thigh. “I-I was just checking your temperature, I promise! When I was little my mom used to check my temperature this way!”

The Mandalorian only groaned in response, gripping your waist tighter and hanging his head, which ended up resting on your stomach.

“But I think you’re sick, Mando,” You held your arms up and away from the man’s body, not sure where to put them.

The armored man only groaned again before a strained voice broke its way through the static of his modulator, “Hot. It’s so hot..”

“Okay umm,” You hesitated. “Do I have permission to take the rest of your armor and shirt off? It should help you cool down.”

You felt the Mandalorian nod, so you got to work with unclasping his shoulder and forearm armor and setting the pieces on the ground. Carefully you inched the t-shirt off and over his helmet, and found out that the overheating man wore two shirts and inched off the long sleeved turtleneck he wore to keep his skin concealed from the world. And finally you took off his gloves. With all these clothes on, you wondered when he had the time to get sun and make his skin such a golden tan. It had to have been when you’re not around, or busy with something inside the ship.

The Mandalorian still rested his head against your stomach and his hands had wandered down from your waist to your thighs, gripping the flesh.

Letting your eyes wander before the Mandalorian sat back up, you noted that his back was wide and rippled with muscle at every breath. The skin was littered with scars, big and small, short and long. The perks of being a bounty hunter, I guess.

You tried to keep your hands to yourself, you really did, but the temptation to rest your hands upon the Mandalorian's shoulders was too much. You gave into the temptation and the man jumped below you before relaxing under your touch.

After a few more heaving breaths, the Mandalorian sat up and looked up at you. You could feel his intense gaze boring into you from underneath a heavily tinted visor of his helmet. His large hands squeezed at the fat of your thighs again before he tried to speak.

"I need you," The man croaked out.

"Wha-?" You were shellshocked at the confession.

"Please," He practically begged. "I can't-"

He could barely finish his sentence before a shivered flowed throughout his body and a groan forced itself passed the Mandalorian's vocal chords.

"Ok-okay," You agreed, nervous. "What-what do I do?"

You could barely get the words from your mouth before the Mandalorian stood at his full height. You hands fell from his shoulders and he gripped your own, his large hands engulfed the area. Gently but urgently, the tall man pushed you backwards. You had no idea where you were going until your surroundings became overcast and you were dead-legged by a firm object behind you. You fell and the plush surface of an unmade bed caught you. The overwhelming smell of manly musk and leather were tell-tale signs that you'd been pushed into the bottom bunk of the small sleeping lofts, the Mandalorian's bunk.

Metal sliding against metal filled the small area and the bunk became dark, too dark to see. You could hear a small "hiss" from somewhere above you and a "clank" of metal being dropped to the ground.

A hand patting around on the side of your face, fingers gently finding their way around. A finger found your lips and within a heartbeat it was replaced by a pair of lips. You jumped in surprise, grabbing onto the body that hovered over you, meeting thick biceps.

The Mandalorian leaned down onto his forearms, one hand resting against the side of your face. He kissed and kissed, switching between quick pecks or smooches. A shiver passed over his body and you heard a groan and a quiet "smack" of a mouth opening. You met the man's open mouth with one of your own, and the Mandalorian practically plunged his tongue into your mouth.

Your tongues danced and teeth found lips, tugging slightly. The Mandalorian pulled away for a moment before nosing his way over the right side of your face and burying himself into your neck. He started out with kissing all over, searching for sweet spots, before leaving open mouthed kisses all over. He accompanied the wet kisses with nips of teeth and the sucking of skin.

At a particularly harsh nip you gasped, "Mando!"

"Din," The Mandalorian breathed out.

"Huh?" You questioned through a foggy brain.

"My name," The Mandalorian answered. "It's Din."

You nodded, hoping that the Mandalorian, Din, would feel your response.

Din moved over to the left side of your neck, giving this side the same treatment.

You felt one of his arms move and you felt a tug at your waistline. A quiet hiss of fabric rubbing against fabric told you that Din was untying the tie at the waist of your pants. You let it happen, gladly. After the loosening of the tie, you could feel your pants and underwear being pushed down. You helped Din out, lifting your hips and using your hands to help shimmy the clothes down your legs. You kicked the fabric away. Instinctively, you tried to close your legs at the cool air against your center, but the body between your legs prevented that. You jumped at the feeling of foreign fingers exploring your lower lips. They traced the skin before dipping into the slit and feeling up the wet flesh hidden away. Din's fingers danced all around, feeling you up and almost trying to mesmerize the new area of flesh. They traveled up and up before skimming against your clit. You hissed at the contact, gripping Din's left bicep tighter. He doubled back, finding your sweet spot.

"Here?" The man asked, rubbing your clit with two fingers.

"Yeah," You breathed out.

The warmth and presence of a body left you as Din sat up. His fingers began rubbing and circling themselves around and on your clit. His other hand gripped at your hip, attempting to keep you still.

You gripped at the wrist of the man's left hand, the one gripping your hip. You whined and moaned, squirming below the man. Due to the special attention and desperation, it didn't take you long to climb to your peak. Your pelvis tightened and tightened.

"You gonna cum?" Din asked, his own arousal evident in his voice.

"Y-yes, sir!" You answered.

Din kept the same pace and pressure and before long you were crying out and squirming. Din kept his fingers moving, helping you ride out your orgasm. But the man kept moving, driving you into overstimulation. You tried to pull Din's hand away from your clit but he captured both your wrists in his left hand and kept moving his hand until you tried to close your legs.

You took a deep breath and relaxed, skin cold due to a light sheen of sweat. You tried to catch your breath and Din pulled his fingers away from your clit. Only a few seconds after did you feel a prodding against your vaginal hole. Din's already wet fingers and your soaking arousal made it easy for Din to edge his one finger inside of you. It wasn't hard to do and you felt his finger, whichever one it was, press itself against your cervix. The Mandalorian gave a few gentle pumps of his finger, bringing out gasps and moans from you.

You yelped a bit, Din's finger pressing uncomfortably against your cervix.

"Two-" You tried to speak between breaths. "Two fingers."

A grunt answered you and Din pulled his singular finger out before pressing two against your opening. He slid in with ease. It was uncomfortable at first, but after a few squelching pumps of the man's fingers you relaxed.

Sensing your relaxed state, Din pulled his fingers from your cunt, which caused a noise of protest to sound from your chest. You could hear the shuffling of clothes and the drop of fabric onto the floor. Din sat you up and moved around you, laying down and taking up your place on the bed. You felt hands grab at you and urge you in a certain direction.

You followed his hands, moving up and over to straddle the Mandalorian. You were surprised to find that the man had already discarded his armor, pants, and boxers. You hovered over Din's pelvis and felt around for his cock. Your searching hand skimmed over Din's dick and you heard the man take in a sharp breath. You grabbed the member, taking note of it's girth, length, and a vein that traveled up the side. You adjusted your body and pressed your vaginal hole over DIn's dick. The head stretched you out a bit more than his fingers and you whimpered at the feeling. A few more presses down and the head practically popped into you. You sighed, sinking down more until you and Din were pelvis to pelvis.

"Comfortable?" Din asked, obviously breathless below you.

"Umm it's-" You tried to get words past you tongue. "Something doesn't feel right."

"Here," Din gripped your hips and forced you down more onto his pelvis.

The movement caused Din's cock to press wonderfully and overwhelmingly against your cervix. You cried out, gripping onto Din's biceps again.

At the adjustment, Din started shallowly thrusting up into you. His hands wandered up from your hips to your abdomen. He gripped your loose t-shirt and pulled it up and off your body. Both of you were now completely naked.

"Gods..," Din breathed out.

He gripped your hips once again, urging you to move on top of him. The meeting of your pelvises was made apparent by a slapping sound. You couldn't help but throw your head up, eyes squeezing shut. You still gripped onto Din's biceps. Din groaned and gasped below you, growling as his thrusts became harsher.

In an almost too-quick-to-process movement, Din gripped your hair into a ponytail in one of his hands and pulled you down by an arm around your shoulder blades. He smashed your lips together so hard to almost hurt. He opened his mouth almost instantly, invading your mouth with his tongue. You wrapped your arms around his head and gripped his hair. His messy, wavy hair caught you by surprise, having never actually seen or felt his hair. You wondered what color it was.

The Mandalorian pulled you from your thoughts when he pulled away and buried his face into the left side of your neck, resuming his previous kissing and nipping. At a rather harsh nip, you pulled the man's hair and Din groaned.

Almost out of nowhere, Din's thrusts up into you sped up and lost their rhythm. His body tensed and you inferred that Din was getting close to his own orgasm. You could feel his heartbeat speed up below you and his breathing become ragged.

"Bite me," You begged.

Din made a questioning noise below you.

A moan forced itself as a sob from your throat and you begged pitifully, "Bite me- bite me- bite me!"

Din listened to your cock drunk babbling and sunk his teeth into your neck. With a muffled groan and the tightening of his jaw, Din reached the peak of his orgasm. Slowly, his harsh thrusts slowed and he relaxed, still keeping himself buried in you. The man unsunk his teeth and let your hair go, letting his head fall back into a pillow and wrapping his other arm around you.

You relaxed into Din's sweaty, hot body. You waited until you caught your breath before speaking.

"You feel better?" You asked.

"Yes," Din answered with a sigh. "Thank you."

You responded with a hum.

"Can we..," Din hesitated. "Can we stay like this for a little bit?"

"Of course," You tell Din. "For as long as you want."

#star wars #the mandalorian #din djarin #star wars x reader #star wars imagines #star wars smut #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian imagines #the mandalorian smut #din djarin x reader #din djarin imagines #din djarin smut #aj posts #aj writies

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xetlynn · 1 month ago

Text

Until Dawn- By Your Side: Chapter Three, Arguments

(Josh Washington X Reader)

[two] [three] [four]

Ashley and Sam talk while I hold myself shivering. “WOOOoooOOoooooOOOO!” We hear from the other side of the door and Sam immediately goes up to the window. “Hi Chris, very funny.” She yells.

“How’d you know it was me?” He furrows his brows, showing his face. “Shouldn’t you be like, getting the lock open or something?” She ignores his question. “On it.” He makes a straight face and walks away. I sigh, throwing my head back.

I glance over to Ashley who’s crossing her arms over her chest. I grab onto her and hug her. Keeping us both warm. “Thanks, [Name].” She whispers, I hum in response, leaning my head on her shoulder. “He needs to hurry up.” I mutter, annoyed.

“Can I join you guys?” Sam asks, I open my arm and we all huddle together for the warmth. “Thank you.” She huffs up.

I hear Chris’s footsteps get closer and we let each other go. “We’re freezing our buns off out here!” Ashley complains and I chuckle remembering the conversation the boys were having earlier. Sam and I go up to the door and watching Chris put the fire on the handle of the door. He glances up at us when he stops and flings the door open. Hurting himself in the process.

“Thank you, thank you, thank, I‘ll be here all week-“ He bows but as he does a badger or some sort of animal runs out of the doorway making him squeal. Us three laugh at his reaction. “Crap that thing freaked me out.” He expresses, looking down at the ground.

“what was it? Are you okay?” Ashley attempts to stop laughing. “It was like a bear or a tiger or something.” He huffs. “Aw it was just a cute little baby wolverine!” Sam does a little pout.

“Baby?” Chris rolls his eyes. “Don’t worry, you’re gonna be a big boy soon.” Josh comes up behind us, slinging his arm over my shoulder, wearing a smirk on his lips.

We all get inside, Josh letting me go to lead the way fully in. “Home sweet home.” He says.

“Sweet is not the word I’d use.” Matt mumbles under his breath.

“I think it’s nice, just needs a little cleaned up.” I get on my tip toes and kiss my boyfriend’s cheek.

“Oh my gosh it’s so good to be inside. Even if it’s still kinda freezing in here.” Ashley happily announces. “I’ll get a fire going.” Josh squeezes my forearm before walking over to the fire place.

“This place barely looks any different.” Matt comments. “Yeah, nobody’s been up here.” Josh tells them.

“Even with all the police coming in and out?” Ashley tilts her head and I sigh at the question. “Not a lot of action up here lately.” Chris says for his best friend. “Nope.” Josh adds. I watch over him as he gets the fire started.

“What’s up party people!” Mike throws his hands in the air excitedly. “Heeey!” Jessica grins. “Hey!” Josh smiles. “Make yourself at home bro.” Josh tells Mike, I only give him a short wave. I’ve never really been his friend. We have a mutual silent agreement where we don’t really speak to one another unless necessary. “Will do.” Mike pretends to take a hat off.

“Yeah, come on in.” Matt says with some sort of disdain laced in his voice. “Take a load off. Have whatever you want.” He stands up. “You just take whatever you want anyways, right?” He gets closer to Mike and I take a deep breath knowing some sort of argument is about to happen. I lean on the wall of the fireplace beside my boyfriend. “Woah, easy there cowboy.” Mike steps back.

“what the hell were you doing with Em out on the trail, huh?” Matt questions him. “What?” Mike furrows his brows. “I saw you and Em. Through the telescope.” Matt explains where he got his information. “Before? We just ran into each other. It’d been a while so we hugged and I said hello. Is that against the law?” Mike asks, I don’t think he’s completely lying but Matt supposedly does with his next sentence. “Erm. Right. Right I’m sure it’s all it was.” Matt sarcastically says.

“You know what? You can think whatever you want. It’s a free country.” Mike tells him. “Watch yourself, Mike.” Matt warns before sitting back down on the couch. Mike goes and sits with my little sister. I subtly glare over at them before looking down at Josh.

“Oh. My god. That is so gross.” Emily’s voice pierces the room. “Are you trying to swallow his face whole?” She asks my sister and I get up from the wall. “Em…” Matt steps in. “Seriously can she be any more obvious?” Emily looks at everyone in the room. “No one wants in on your territory, honey.” Emily tells Jessica.

“Excuse me, did you say something?” Jess stands up.

“Oh did you not hear me? Was your sluttiness too loud?” Emily comes back at her and I shake my head. “Sounds like someone’s bitter she didn’t make the cut.” Jess smiles to her boyfriend who seems like he’s enjoying the show. “Yeah. It’s all a big cattle call with that dreamboat. Congrats, you’re top cow.” Emily congratulates her. “Cuts real deep calling Miss Homecoming a cow.” My sister says.

“Hey, let’s calm it down, both of you.” I point to them. “You’re making everyone uncomfortable, Jess.” Matt adds in. “Jealous much?” Jess asks him. I close my eyes trying to restrain myself from yelling at them. Somehow Josh doesn’t even care as he still works on the fire. “Emily too frigid for you, too?”

“Hey, that’s, that’s uncalled- look-“ Matt starts. “Whatever. I don’t give a crap what you think.” Jessica tells them.

“At least I can think. 4.0 bitch, honor roll.” Emily says and I press my lips together. “Suck on that when you’re trying to sleep your way into a job.” I get closer to Emily and wave her to stop.

“Knock it off, please.” I whisper, looking over to my boyfriend who just wanted a fun trip. “Who needs grades when you’ve got all the natural advantages you can handle.” Jessica says and I wince at the horrible come back. “Oh please.”

“You couldn’t buy a moldy loaf of bread with your skanky ass.” Jess snaps at Em. “Are you serious? Do you think that’s insulting?” Emily laughs. “That bitch is on crack or something.” Jess looks to her boyfriend.

“Jessica, you need to shut your mouth, okay?” Matt tells my sister. “Matt, zip it.” I groan, planting my face in my hands.

“no, you’re the one who needs to keep your nose out of other people’s business.” Jessica points a finger at him.

“I’m about to get right up in your business you bitch.” Emily steps closer and this is where I jump in. “Are we about to get real? Cause I am down to get real.” Jessica gets in Em’s face.

“Alright, enough you two. What the fuck?” I push them both back. “Are you serious? This is not why we came here.” I tell them and Josh is standing behind me. “This is not helping. It’s not what I wanted.” He says to them and they look down.

“If we can’t get along for ten minutes then maybe we need a little bit of a break, right?” Josh says and I notice the girls glaring at one another again and I shove both of them. “Knock it the fuck off, seriously.” I whisper.

“Mike, why don’t you check out the guest cabin. The one I told you about.” Josh offers to him and my sister. I snap my head over at him with wide eyes. “Yeah… yeah, alright.” Mike stands up, reaching out for Jessica but I step in between them. “No. No, just for you to screw my little sister like the asshole you are?” I furrow my eyebrows. “Hey, calm down. I’m not going to do that.” He scoffs.

Jessica hits my arm. “It’s not your place to say no.” She tells me. “I’m just looking out for you.” I argue, slapping her back. “I don’t need you to do that. I’m going where ever that whore isn’t.” She walks past me and joins Mike.

“You’re so stupid Jessica.” I huff out, super irritated. “What ever, [Name]. Stay out of my life then.” She tells me and I roll my eyes. “Would love to.” I mumble, crossing my arms as I watch Mike and her walk out of the room. “It’s right up the trail.” Josh directs Mike and I give him a look. A very angered expression. Matt lets out a large sigh. Doing a mind blowing noise. “Glad that’s over.” He says.

“Yeah.” Josh gets back down to start the fire. “So Josh… uh, should we get this fire going?” Matt offers a helping hand.

“Where’s my bag?” Emily asks suddenly. “Huh?” Matt looks back to his girlfriend. “My bag! The, the little bag with the pink pattern. The one I got on Rodeo.” Emily questions. “Matt are you listening?”

“Oh my god, don’t you remember? Next to the Italian shoe place where I got the stilettos and you knocked over the rack while you were drooling all over that girl at the counter?” She reminds him. “well, I mean, she was asking about my letter jacket-“

“Right. Because she gave a shit about your designer letter jacket.” Emily rolls her eyes, I just plop down on the couch. Over the arguing that Emily always seems to bring. “Why do you hate my jacket?” Matt steps closer to her. “Matt I need my bag!” She says.

“oh my god Em, maybe you just forgot it.”

“Do you seriously think I’d forget my bag?” Emily questions him, raising a brow. I look over to the stairs to see Ash, Sam, and Chris there awkwardly as we all listen to this. “Well, I-“ “Do you?” She cuts him off. “Guess not.” He falters. “You must have left it down by the cable car station.” She says and he groans. “C’mon hun. We’ll be back soon.”

“And then we can get warm?” He asks and I know what he means by that. Every guy here is a pervert. “We can get very warm.” Emily responds, sway her body. “Okay. Okay, let’s go.” He motions to the front door and they leave.

“Okay. I’m gonna go take a bath.” Sam stands up, heading up the stairs.

Josh stands up, suddenly remembering to give Mike the keys and even though I’m upset with him. I get up to follow. His hand finding my own. “You’re mad at me.” He states quietly. I don’t look at him, only shrugging. “I’ll make it up to you.” He tells me.

“We’ll see.” I let go of his hand and open the door. “Here’s the keys.” I take them from Josh and throw them over to Mike who catches. “Hey, sorry to kick you out like that.” Josh goes over to them and I fold my arms over my chest beside him. “No worries man.” Mike waves it off.

“Oh I’m sure you’ll find a way to entertain yourselves.” Josh smirks, Jess hums in response and I feel like I’m gonna gag. “You have fun with the peanut-gallery.” Jess points into the house. Josh does a gun noise, pointing fingers to his head. He walks backwards but then stops. “Oh! Almost forgot. Gotta fire up the generator so you can see where you’re going.” Josh says. “It’s dark out there.” He goes back inside. I stand there for a minute looking between them. Shaking my head as I head back in as well.

“You ruined it, Josh.” I tell him, moving past him sort of angrily. “I figured.” He sighs, grabbing onto my arm before I could make it too far away from him.

“I just want everything to be perfect tonight.” He whispers, bringing me close to him. I know I’m not going to stay mad but what’s going on with Jess has been too much lately. She doesn’t even seem like my little sister anymore. “I… I understand.” I frown. I don’t understand but this trip is about Josh. Not me.

“I love you, [Name].” He says out of the blue staring into my eyes. I shyly look away. It took us a while to say the “L-word,” both of us having weird pasts with relationships and unfortunately what just happened to his family. So whenever he says it, it still feels like the first time. “I love you too.” I tell him, he pulls me into a kiss. “More than you’ll ever know.” He mumbles, holding me tight like I’m going to disappear. “Getting a little sentimental on me, Josh.” I pull away just the tiniest bit. His hands still around my waist.

“Only a little bit.” He chuckles, we head back to the living room.

“Sammy!” I shout. “What?” She asks back. “Need help getting the bath ready?” I tease her. “Um, well. I’m about to get into said bath.” She chuckles as my head peaks into the room. “Do you need any help with that?” I smirk. “Hardy har.” She smiles.

“I was just checking in with you.” I stop messing with her, watching as she turns the water on. I cross my arms, figuring the hot water isn’t on. “Do you know how to hook up the hot water in this big fancy lodge? Or at least your boyfriend hopefully does.” She turns to me and I shrug. “We’ll go get it figured out. Don’t miss me too much while I’m gone.” I blow a kiss, jogging out of the room and back down stairs.

“Love-“

“You can do it, man. We believe in you.” I hear Chris quietly say to Josh so I immediately quiet down. “Yeah! Totally! Woohoo! Let’s go Jo-osh let’s go!” Ashley cheers.

“Okay well I am pretty sure that somewhere in this crazy place we used to have… a spirit board.” Josh randomly tells them, I make a face remembering when him and his sisters used to try to get me to play the board with them. “Those things are a joke, man. They don’t do shit.” Chris says.

“No way bro. We used to do it all the time. [Name], me and… well.”

“Hey, love. The hot water isn’t on. Sam is pissed!” I got over to him, slinging my arms dramatically over his shoulders. “Oh, we gotta fire up the boiler. It’s in the basement.” He tells me, I let him go. “You guys see if you can find the spirit board.” He points to Ash and Chris, Ashley gets excited. “Chris let’s go find it, it’ll be like a scavenger hunt!” She grins.

“Umm… okay… guess so.” Chris slowly goes after her. “Rad. You’re not gonna regret it.” Josh chuckles. “You ready?” He turns to me, sticking his hand out for me to take. I hum, taking it.

“You notice how I gave Chris and Ash a mission together?” Josh asks me as he takes a flashlight out of a drawer. “I did.” I smile.

“Yeah I was thinkin’ they could use some ‘alone time.’ Like we could use some alone time.” He wiggles his eyebrows and I laugh. “You thinking tonight’s the night?” I ask, messing with him.

No, we haven’t done “it” yet. With everything going on it just didn’t feel right. Along with the I love you thing. As much as a pervert Josh is, he’s actually a sweetheart. Sex also just isn’t on his mind like that. We both respect one another on that. “Really?” He tilts his head, I could tell he actually got excited by my question.

“If you want to… I wouldn’t be opposed to it.” I take the flashlight from his hand and lead our way

Masterlist

Josh M.L.

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mangalho · 2 years ago

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Ex-warbot OC

They don’t have names yet.

The two bots with the scary faces were specifically made for war, and now that it’s over, they still maintained their original ‘warface’ even though it has stigma associated to it. Many robots changed their faceplates post-war, as it made it easier to find jobs and not get into unnecessary conflict.

The sleeker looking guy used to be in their company, though he wasn’t made in the same factory as them; he isn’t their ’batch-mate’.

After the war he completely modified his frame, and now has an idol career. He desperately wats to erase his past, as people (and robots alike) will respond better to a ‘new’ and untainted idol.

The two warface bots are “brother and sister” and they do odd jobs here and there to make ends meet and to be able to afford things they want. Rich people hire them as bouncers a lot since they are a symbol of terrible times. Sometimes they earn 15k in one night for just one gig it’s crazy. They both really love clothes since it distances them from their body’s original purpose while simultaneously not erasing their past. Also they look cute and cool!

The idol bot once meets the warfaces by chance in the street and pretends he doesn’t know them AGAHAKALAK I think he’s insane… completely erasing your past and the person you were is psychopathic to me idk. Anyway

There arent a lot of warfaces going around anymore. since they either died during the war or changed their frames. Pre-war bots were re-fitted during the conflicts and just had to go back to their former unweaponized frames after it was all over so they’re fine. All of these robots can download information and i want that type of learning to mostly disappear if its deleted, but if they learn things like we do or experience real events, those memories and skills can’t really truly be erased; if they do try erasing them, they will still remember them, just not with HD video clarity, which brings them immense suffering sometimes. “How to people live like this?!” Well buddy it sucks idk we all cope

Newly minted robots are wack because they don’t exactly have a ‘soul’ yet they just do things they’re supposed to do, but after some time, all of them actually develop real awareness and shit… my war bots had like a 78% chance of dying everyday when they were activated, but they survived and attained sentience at like one year post birth and they wised up rly fast after that. They remember their first year, but they describe it as a ‘weird haze’

These robots feel pain so they wont like dive into a hole or damage themselves too much. Self preservation means longer-lived machines which means less repair costs and less human lives on the line as well.. slay !!!

While the conflicts went on, most robots achieved sentience and decided to stop fighting so there was like a robots rights movement and eventually the war stopped altogether and now the robots have a salary and a normal life mostly. They arent organics, so they need other things. They are solar powered and need oil sometimes and also they need new nanomachines once in a while like we need vaccines. Get your boosters… its not just tetanus and coronavirus anymore now they gotta think about like..the trojan horse 9000

I want them to have this aversion to organic things dying bc they are universally gross. Like they dont like seeing living-machines die either but a rat being squished by a car is also gross!

There are probably some tensions between humans and robots but like i kinda get it bc i wouldnt mess with a guy who has like lead pipes for arms. also most robots ARE normal but some are insane idk 🙆‍♀️🤷‍♀️ just like people are.

mine are normal tho they’re just vibing 💖🗣🤙

#drawans #OC #warface

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skulls-soul · 10 months ago

Text

Somebody give me Bowser being absolutely, and utterly afraid of falling in love again

Come on people don’t be scared to break hearts

After years of rejection, maybe Bowser is just good at faking confidence? maybe secretly he’s just as insecure as Luigi huuu? Ever thought of that (probably)

Like come on, give me Bowser, having not only a fuck no why him?!? mentality when he finds out that he fell for Luigi but also a ignoring all of these emotions and waiting for them to die, is the best course of action

What do you mean every time he looks at Luigi. There’s a little ember in his eyes?His eyes are red! There’s always an ember to them!!!

Give me moment’s of butterflies and bliss just for there to be a down spiral into panic and doubt. There’s no possible way that Luigi could love me after all of the things that I’ve done to him and his loved ones.

give me a Luigi falling head over heels for the Koopa and trying to figure out whether or not if Bowser likes him

Not only that give me Luigi going to Mario and peach for advice

“ I don’t know what to do. One moment he is complementing my outfit and then the next he’s calling my eyes to blue” (insert what the fuck face here)

Mario and his wife peach had to try really hard to convince Luigi that Bowser does like him, but for some reason he’s not doing anything about it

“ I know what heart struck looks like on bowsers face and he certainly looks at you that way weege”

But It wasn’t until peach mentions bowsers history of rejection in were both Mario brothers were like oooooooh *face slap*

Now, technically by this point Luigi can just ask Bowser onto a date, but that’s too easy, so how about instead Luigi just blatantly flirts with Bowser in hopes that Bowser would be the one to ask him on a date. Both Mario and peach agree to this idea thinking that he just needs a little nudge nudge

Even going as far as to comment on Luigis affection towards the king

Mario: “ you and Luigi made really good partners in this race, besides when he’s with me, peach or Daisy, I’ve never seen him have so much fun”

Peach: “ Luigi speaks very highly of you. It almost reminds me of the time of when he used to talk about Prince Peasley, that way” (this would’ve been one of the nail in the coffin. If it wasn’t for the fact that Bowser was unaware of Luigis crush on The bean Prince)

This just leads everyone to be frustrated because all of the hints and Luigi’s moves are not working the way that they want it to. It wasn’t until Daisy mentioned that Bowser is one of the most stubborn people that they know and “if he has his mind set on some thing a.k.a. not letting his feelings affect him and Luigi’s friendship which he seems to value a lot then he’s probably going to fight tooth and nail to keep it that way”

Mario, peach and Luigi: ooooooh *face slap*

this is in fact 100% true each and every single flirt or comment left Bowser spiraling finding himself laying awake at night thinking about all the wat ifs and the maybes only for him to remember that he had the same thoughts and hopes with peach only for them to shoot him right back at his face with the devastation

Also, give me Bowser trying to separate himself. his feelings for lu is getting so out of hand that he’s starting to imagine that the plumber is flirting with him! what delusion!!! (Smh)

Finally, with help from his best friend, Daisy Luigi, planned on to finally ask Bowser to go out with him romantically

Now, I don’t know about you, but that seems like a good place to insert a happy ending….

Ooooor

I’m just saying! I’m just saying. maybe Bowser does try dating.…. Just other people aka someone that’s not Luigi

Luigi, finding this out is absolutely heartbroken (my poor boy what have I done?) thinking that maybe he waited too long that maybe him and his friends were wrong and that it was just him getting his hopes up because as we all remember, weege is familiar with rejection to

It isn’t until his dear friend Daisy, ever the hothead goes up to Bowser yelling at him for leading her bestie on and going on a date with some scamp

Bowser is absolutely flabbergasted, but also over the moon yet also petrified, because he potentially ruined yet another possible happily ever after. Thankfully, Daisy knows what to do to fix this.

While all this is happening, Luigi unaware of his besties wereabouts is in his room, reading a bunch of sad romance novels that don’t have any happy endings. It isn’t until Luigi stands up to go get himself a snack that Luigi receives a text message from Bowser’s asking if they can meet up.

Luigi internally is flipping out because on one hand, he would love to see his Bowser, but on the other hand, he knows for a fact that Bowser his friend would want to talk about his date, and Luigi doesn’t know if he can handle that right now

But this is a Weege we’re talking about. He loves to be there for his friends and family, even if it would hurt him, so he reluctantly agreed.

Let’s say, Bowser invites Luigi to practice racing with him in where you can immediately tell that there is an awkward tension in the air. Bowser is not to surprised by this, but Luigi is because as far as he knows, Bowser doesn’t know that he has feelings for him. (good Lord Daisy you better hope that Luigi doesn’t get upset at you for outing his emotions.)

They go on a race or two before taking a little break and getting back into the swing of their friendship, when Luigi decides that he would rather rip the bandage off, then painstakingly wait for Bowser’s to open up

Luigi tries his best, not to let his excitement show when Bowser says that him, and his date both agreed that a second one will not be happening. Even so, after hearing those words, lu very quickly made up his mind it might not be what him and Daisy planned, but if he waits any longer then Bowser’s next date might be the one to get to call him their’s a Luigi would rather fail from trying rather than not trying at all

Because the pain of never knowing what could’ve been hurt so much more than Bowser’s potential rejection

“ if you don’t mind, can I recommend someone for you to try a date with?”

“Oh?”

“Ya… you wouldn’t so happen to be interested in a little green plumber would you”?

Bowser’s takes a moment to realize what just happened and it probably would’ve taken him longer if it wasn’t for the fact that Luigi started repeatedly saying sorry backpedaling try to fix what was starting to feel like a mistake (what can I say I’m a sucker for an anxious Angsty mess)

Bowser, surprisingly soft-spoken says yes, causing Luigi to look up at him. Shock is in his eyes before his smile meet them.

“Cool” Luigi would say as he tries to keep his smile on the down low but he can’t help it especially if Bowser‘s tail decides to thump besides him

#luigi #luigi nintendo #bowuigi #bowser #bowigi #bowser x luigi #bowser and luigi #luigi x bowser #bowser nintendo #king koopa #luigi/bowser #bowser/luigi #luigi and bowser #if this idea sparks joy then by all means use it for your creativity #angst/comfort #happy ending #I can’t handle anything that’s just pure angst #And refuses to read anything that doesn’t have a happy ending #listen I read to escape reality and I don’t mind being reminded of it’s cold nature as long as there’s warmth in the end

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creekfiend · 1 year ago

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I get a lot of asks about training advice and I'm always like "well I am not a professional in any capacity" and also I forget every book I have ever read etc the moment someone asks me, but I remembered at random today that my very talented friend has written a really amazing training book that I think would be especially good for the people who tend to ask me this, bc Bridger has ADHD (LIKE DO MANY OF US) and is therefore really good at breaking things down into digestible chunks! this is one of the things I find most challenging about training so I think this is an extra valuable thing to have in a book.

It's mostly training basics for people who are beginners, but in a way where you can use the info the build a LOT of skills once you grasp the basics, and I really vibe with Bridger's ethics around training as well.

it's called Level Up Your Dog Training by Natalie Bridger Watson and I'm going to provide a couple different links where you can get it.

Amazon link:

Support a small business link:

(Bridger adds: "Also for accessibility, there is a large print paperback edition (Amazon only) and a digitally-narrated audiobook (Google Play only, trying to get it available more places). Am aware of the ethical implications of AI narration and would like to replace this with a human-narrated version when I can, but that costs $1,000-$2,000+ to hire out, so the not-ideal compromise is digitally-narrated for accessibility in the short term with plans to do better when I can.")

Anyway this is a really great book and not recommended as often as it should be bc it's just not one of the standard go-to books (yet!!!) so I thought I would plug it and in doing so answer all the training rec asks I get all the time and am so bad at answering 🤣

#dog t #PLS FEEL FREE TO REBLOG ITS A RLY GOOD BOOK.#other online training content i like include smart bitch dog training #superpup academy #ummm #cogdog ofc but a lot of that goes over my head bc im not a sports guy lol.

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pelova4president · 1 year ago

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That stupid smile of hers II

Esmee Brugts x nedwnt!R

I of that stupid smile of hers

summary~ after the World Cup y/n goes back to North London and Esmee to Barcelona. Will they at least try to make things work?

Vic was running after me, yelling my name. I stepped into our changing room and sat at my cubby, head in my hands, how Esmee was sat just moments ago.

Victoria stopped in her tracks, i could feel her eyes on me. “Kijk y/n, ik weet niet wat er gaande is tussen jou en Esmee dus alsjeblieft vertel het me zodat ik kan helpen” (Look y/n, i don’t know what is going on with you and Esmee so please tell me so i can help) she begged. I took my hands off my eyes and looked up at her. “Vic ze gaat naar barça..” (Vic, she’s joining barça..) she held her arms open and i sobbed onto her shoulder.

Vic knew that Esmee’s and my friendship wasn’t all platonic but she didn’t ask questions, she just held me. But i fell, i fell hard and fast and there was nothing she could do to protect me from that heartbreak now. “Ssshh.. het komt goed, we hebben de internationale breaks nog en je kunt dr opzoeken als we vrije tijd hebben… het komt goed y/n” (Ssshh.. it’s gonna be okay, we’ve got the international breaks and you can visit her in your free time… it’s gonna be okay y/n) she assured me.

We got onto our flights, Vic and I to London, Esmee to Barça. I haven’t really talked to her since she told me about Barça. Before she walked to her gate she gave me a hug and put a piece of paper in my hands.

I got onto the plane, exhausted from the last 24 hours. I fell asleep and when i woke up I remembered what Es gave me.

‘I’m sorry but i couldn’t waste this chance. It’s a once in a lifetime chance y/n, it’s my dream. I get that you’re upset with me but i hope you’ll give me another chance’

I couldn’t hold the tears in, my emotions were all over the place and i couldn’t control them all anymore. Vic looked at me and hugged me. I had to tell someone so i told Vic everything, about how i thought she was annoying, all the times we got lost, how she told me they wanted to offer her a contract in England and the kiss. I knew she knew i had a crush on Esmee but it felt good to actually tell someone about it all.

y/n_y/l/n

liked by esmeebrugts and 12.563 others

wore the badge with honour, i can’t thank you all enough for the support. I love this team. so thankful for the people i met ❤️

comments

svandesanden only love 🫶

victoriapelova ❤️❤️

esmeebrugts to many more adventures 😍

esmeefan22 is that esmee on photo 1 and 4??

↳ y/l/nisaballer it has to be, y/n is also wearing esmee’s sweater in photo 4!!

↳ esmeefan22 they’re sooo cute together i can’ttt

esmeebrugts

liked by y/n_y/l/n and 11.419 others

a dream come true playing at this world cup. So proud to be part of this amazing team. Our dream ended too soon for us… Thank you to all the Oranje fans, the staff and my teammates. Onto the next adventure

ps. I may not have won the World Cup but I did beat the ‘fifa champion of england’ 😉

comments

y/n_y/l/n i won the first game so it doesn’t count

↳ esmeebrugts the first one of twenty games yeah

y/nbrugtslovr soft launching??

↳ brugts4life they’re definitely dating

When i finally got home i texted Esmee.

y/n: hey es, ik heb je briefje gelezen. Je verdient deze kans, ik zou nooit boos op je kunnen zijn. Laat het weten als je bent aangekomen in Barcelona. (hey es, i’ve read your letter. You deserve this chance, i could never be mad at you. Let me know if you’ve arrived in Barcelona)

es: hi y/n/n ik ben veilig aangekomen. Ik mis je nu al, het spijt me dat we zo afscheid moesten nemen maar ik kom je snel opzoeken, ondertussen kunnen we facetimen. Het komt goed. (hi y/n/n i’ve arrived safely. I already miss you, i’m sorry we had to say goodbye like that but i’ll visit you soon and we can facetime in the meantime. Everything’s gonna be alright.)

I spent the next few weeks facetiming and texting Esmee whenever i could. Her signing hadn’t been announced yet but she has met the barcelona squad and told me all about it. Her first few days were hard. Only a few of the girls spoke enough english to have a conversation with and Esmee couldn’t really talk any Spanish let alone Catalan. It was Aitana Bonmatí who took her under her wing, with a little bit of translation from Ingrid.

The move from The Netherlands to Spain was still hard though, the culture was different, she didn’t really have someone to rely on and she was homesick. So she was looking forward to the first break they had.

When Barça announced her signing i was way too proud not to comment on it.

esmeebrugts, fcbfemeni

liked by oranjeleeuwinnen and 35.679 others

Excited to announce a new dutch talent to barça, welcome Esmee Brugts

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liekemartens vamosss 🔴🔵

y/n_y/l/n so so proud, you deserve it! ❤️

We had a few days off before the season started and i wanted nothing more than to see Esmee so i booked a flight, to Spain. I wanted to surprise her and spend some time with her after only seeing each other over the phone.

It was well into the evening when i arrived at Esmee’s apartment. I bought a bouquet flowers for her at the airport, what kind of gir- friend.. would i be if i came empty handed.

It took Es a few seconds to open the door after i knocked but there she was, a sleepy Esmee looking at me like she’d just seen a ghost. “Mag ik ook nog binnen komen of…” (Can i come in or…) i laughed. She opened the door for me and gave me a hug.

She went to get something to drink for me and i took in her apartment, it was so typically Esmee. It was modern but cozy and there were photos everywhere. A photo of the two of us after a game on the bus standing next to her television.

She came into the living room, holding two cups of tea. “Ik heb je echt gemist weet je” (I’ve really missed you, you know) she told me once we were both settled. “Ik jou ook” (I’ve missed you too) I told her. I put my cup on the table and layed my head on her chest, the sound of her heartbeat bringing me to sleep.

When i woke up we were both in bed, I was still laying on top of her but i had her hoodie on and a pair of her barca sweatpants. Esmee was still asleep so i walked into the kitchen and started making breakfast for the two of us.

I was almost done with the eggs when i felt two arms wrap around my stomach and a head rest on my shoulder. She hummed good morning and gave me a kiss on my cheek, something she hasn’t really done since we’ve been apart.

Eating breakfast i told her about my journey and about Viv and Vic. Esmee had the day off so she would be able to show me the city.

We went to Esmee’s favourite cafe, did some shopping and went out to dinner. Es had made a reservation for the two of us at some fancy restaurant. She had asked her teammates for advice and they came with a few of the best restaurants in Barcelona.

After dinner she took me to her favourite spot. She told me all about it, this was really the only place she felt like home when she first arrived in Barcelona. Her appartement was still empty and didn’t really feel like a home. This place reminded her of home, the green grass and the water, it was just so peaceful. Esmee wasn’t used to all the noise and choas in the big city.

She took a blanket out of her bag and placed it on the ground. We layed next to each other, my arms around her stomach and my head on her chest. She gave me a kiss on my forehead and took in the moment.

Esmee took my hand in hers and squeezed it. “y/n wil je mijn vriendin zijn?” (y/n will you be my girlfriend?) she asked me. I kissed her and told her just how much i wanted to be her girlfriend.

The days went by quicker than i would’ve liked. I was dreading the day that i would have to go back to London and we would have to communicate over the phone again. I liked it here. I liked to be with Esmee.

The next break i got i went straight to Barcelona to see Esmee play. The stadium was absolutely packed and i couldn’t contain my excitement watching her play.

y/n_y/l/n

Traveling between England, Spain and The Netherlands was getting exhausting so when Barça offered me a contract i couldn’t say no.

I was sad to leave London, to leave The Arsenal but i needed a new challenge, i needed my lover and that is where Barça is.

I haven’t told Esmee yet but i might have a little plan of telling her.

y/n_y/l/n

liked by fcbfemeni and 15.439 others

lieverd, i’m coming home

comments have been disabled

Not long after i got an incoming call from a certain Barça player. “wat bedoel je met ‘lieverd, i’m coming home’?!” (what do you mean by ‘lieverd, i’m coming home’?!) she almost yelled. I giggled “Es, je weet wat ik bedoel. Ik ga naar Barça” (Es, you know what i mean. I’m going to Barça) i told her.

This time around those four words were everything i could’ve hoped for. I was gonna be with my lover, i’m gonna go home.

esmeebrugts, y/n_y/l/n

liked by victoriapelova and 27.673 others

she’s coming home everybody. she’s a culer.

comments

victoriapelova credits to me for making this happen?

↳ daniellevddonk i think we deserve a medal or something

y/nsbrugts i knew it!!!

brugtsfan22 they’re so cute together 😭

wosofan11 if you look close enough you can see me jumping off that eiffel tower 🥰

When i arrived at Esmee’s apartment, or should i call it our appartement, our home. I was greeted with a big smile, that stupid smile of hers and a kiss. “Stop met zo naar me lachen, je ziet er dom uit” (Stop smiling at me like that, you look stupid) i shoved her.

“Niet liegen, je houdt van mijn domme lach” (Don’t lie, you love my stupid smile”

A/N thanks everyone for reading my fic. There aren’t really any Esmee fics so i thought i’d write my own. If you have any fic ideas let me know!! <3

#esmee brugts #esmee brugts x reader #jill roord #vivianne miedema #fcb femeni #aitana bonmati #victoria pelova #nedwnt #oranjeleeuwinnen #woso x reader

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rametarin · 10 months ago

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"Social Justice" advocate: "So you see, this is why the Nazis were bad. They picked out a people for their ethnicity and religion and systematically killed them. Because they weren't white or Christian, they killed them. Because they weren't cishetero, they killed them."

Me: "Ah, I see. So, naturally, discrimination against any people on the basis of their ethnicity is wrong, and you shouldn't discriminate against their sexuality or gender identity or sex, either. Genocide is wrong when the rulership of a society determines that a group of people have no legitimacy or right to exist and moves to propagandize the humanity and validity out of them, and either keeps them as second class citizens, or exterminates them. We need to keep these lessons of history close to our chests and remember not to embrace ideologies that permit them. The Nazis spread propaganda about how the Jews were an evil parasite running around taking over business and government to breed them out and creep a defacto ethnostate in to replace them. Such things are terrible and are to be avoided."

"Social Justice" advocate: "Oh, no. You totally should do those things."

Me: "wat."

"Social Justice" advocate: "The lesson here is that white supremacy is bad, and WW2 was the fault of capitalism. Also that heterosexuality is a harmful myth perpetuated by the Patriarchy, biological sex doesn't mean anything and you're part of the problem if you think it does, even applied only to your self-selected identity, and the Future is Female."

Me: "I feel like maybe it wasn't me that missed the point of why Nazi Germany was bad."

"Social Justice" advocate: "Those money grubbing people whose culture revolves around exploiting the Outsider to their own ethnic makeup, parasiting off of more worthy cultures and people indigenous to their own homelands. They migrate there in waves and corrupt the wholesome people with their decadent ways and culture, taking over places to make themselves the privileged elites ruling over the common folk."

Me: "Hm. I've seen this before, somewhere."

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t8oo · 7 months ago

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By all accounts the lupin fandom has always prided itself as a drama free ship war free open to polyamory and wildly different headcanons fandom. And I can name a few people that have worked hard to keep this place very friendly. And I really started in this fandom in a friendly place. I even managed to make friends that Liked Luzeni maybe even just as much as me. I was ecstasic. I really loved those people so much, I talked to them daily. Some of them I respected so much for their craft. Great.

Id always been upfront and very clear that they were befriending someone who was fucked in the head. And i dont mean seasonal depression type I mean Bipolar and Bpd and all the symptoms it entails. Im not even going to mention the upbringing and the life ive had. All of it was a complete and violently abusive catastrophy.

Last year I exhibited symptoms that were intense. TOXIC. It didnt mean that I was toxic to my friend, because I was rational enough to know about boundaries. I was at the end of my rope. For undisclosed reasons I had to be interned. Great. During the ultimate time that lead me to become crazy, not a single person i thought was my friend gave me a hand. I received a message from one friend while I was litteraly perched on the windowsill about to jump telling me about their life. Not asking abt me. I sent some Hey thats cool but im about to kill myself and they didnt reply. Days after I was interned they told me that my message triggered them so they had to have an emergency meeting with their psychiatrist. Cool. Nothing abt me still. Sorry ? Fallout 1

During yhat whole shitstorm and despite everything a friend became my like. favorite person in bpd terms. Just really fucking embarassing shit really. I tried to prevent it, i tried to pull out not to make it worse, which not only was making it worse but was making it toxic. I aparently blew out, which of course my memory conveniently forgot. I said something ahout their partner. They never explained what. Again, after internment I apologized. They told me they needed time. They bsolutely deserved it. I was probably horrible to warrant that reaction. I might even have been toxic. Again, I do not remember what I even said. Im not a demonic entity it couldnt have been like I desacrated them and insulted them beyond repair. Even in my anger I have always been limited. But all i can do is speculate. They never explained, just took my apology. And then They never came back. That friend I liked so much that despite everything I did to control myself became a person i liked beyond wat was normal. We have had so much fun. Not enough to mend bridges or explained anything. Fallout 2

During that blow out one friend meddled, asking that other friend for information ? I asked to pass along a message to friend B. which friend A refused. Like it was not their business, even tho they were clearly invested in the business enough to talk to both of us about it lol. No problem. 4 days ago thou i confronted a group of friends that were friends As friend, for kicking them out of an rp group for no reason, even bordering on racism. My friend feels hurt about that event, has always hinted at it. it even stopped them from rping, something they did for 12 years. They had no closure and so I tried to bring it to them. Asshole move or empathic ? Thinking back i may have been taking the situation personnaly because i was already on my way out menrally. I dont know. All i know is that four days later, after i talked for hours to that group and the reason why they treated my friend so poorly that they still had scars over it, i was experiencing a mental crisis and that friend refused a request. Great. Fallout 3

The last friend litteraly stood by and said nothing. Not before the fallout and not after. I dont even know'if that counts as a fallout. This girl was so cute, so fun, so talented, so FUNNY. And when it came to a heed she said nothing. No side taking. Neutrality. Okay

At this point I no longer had anyone to talk to I think. I was documenting my attempt and the horrible conditions of the psych ward on twitter for everyone of my "friends" to see. One i particularly loved so much because they genuinely were on the same level of insanity related to luzeni made a tweet about the late hystix, a person i did not know but a lot of the lupin fandom did. A beautiful soul that was always supportive and kind. Everyone was mourning her. It was truly heartbreaking. I hope she is in peace. Our attempts matched in timing, it was actually mindblowing. Mine just fucking failed because of nosy neighbors. I feel so close to her in spirit still. That we both struggled so much that we came to the conclusion that nothing could save us. She did not have the nosy neighbors. That friend mourned her publicly.. on twitter. Ok. Logical, its a depressing, horrible and sad situation all around. All we can do is mourn. Still, it was a friend I was genuinely close to. That never showed the empathy they did to me. Hey dude so im kind of facing the exact same issues but you never reached out ? While my torment was there and documented on twitter because again. I did not fucking know wat was going on. I was in a strict mental ward under a lot of dosage from nurses who refused to give me insulin even thou i was type 1. Friend said that they tweeted at me. No mention of the years and years of discussions we had on discord and me checking up on them everytime they pulled out for severe family matters and i was genuinely concerned. Nope they aparently tweeted something at me. Okay. Thank you for the concern. Your investment really shows. Fallout 4

after that I stopped friends all together. The fact that friends I was talking nigh on everyday to each revealed their lack of concern for me during an extreme mental health crisis was abyssmal to say the least.

Fallout 5 came with Sheen. I was managing a charity zine for Palestine, and the lack of investment from so many artists brought me to the edge. I took it out on Sheen in the softest way possible. I told them I was disapointed in their piece and that it looked low effory. Sheen, a person I had knwon for the entirety of my investment in the lupin fandom, decided that an offense was enough to block me and never speak again. Once again i was on the verge of yet another blow out. And it happened. Lol. Its just so funny in retrospect that everytime I start acting weird alluding to a breakdown people shun me out despite, you know. me being clear abt my medical record. I realized that I was rude to Sheen and it was uncalled for. Apologized publicly not in the attempt that Sheen sees it but just so that everyone knows that if they hear abt the story, at least they know its all been my fault. Online friendships are so cool because it just takes the block button to burn bridges without coming back. With no chance of mending or at least a genuine apology. so Fallout 5

Is there a reason that all of these issues happened within one fandom ? I do think so. Unless i am incredibly unlucky. Or an abusive piece of shit unbeknownst to me. I think that the lupin fandom is surface level niceties. If they dont like you you will know. It will be passive but you will be muted and eventually just ostracized. You will not be invited in fandom events, or group discussions. It did not help that my mental health was constantly deteriorating and I started developping a persecution complex, thinking that people were making secret discords where they were telling others to avoid me or something. Ive endured all of this for one thing. One Humiliating thing : i love luzeni. I love it so much I want a tatto of it. I love it so much that after years before sleep I pick a random fic and then imagine their discussions. I love their dynamic so much. I love their romance I love how fucking inhinged they are i love that they hurt and love each other the same, i love that they cant live without the other, that they genuinely complete each other in a really ugly but complete patchwork of mental illness and really elaborate kinks.

I gave up thou. Another depression, I blew out, attempted again with the window, got caught and sent to the hospital. It pulled me back from the fandom. I realized i was allocating so much of my thoughts to it and how I could be better perceived, how I could make friends again to talk about the fictional thing i loved the most in the world. And I realized that in giving up and keeping to myself, that I could be more stable. That the damage was done and I cant really enjoy this fandom anymore, but Im still attached to the hip to luzeni and so in the words of a really brilliant man... Nah... Ill do my own thing.

U might be wondering why the hell is this bitch airing their laundry publicly. Its therapeutic. You dont have to read or care. If those friends see it, and make a comment of their own about how the events did NOT happen like I told, I would love to hear how they perceived it. I do not give my friendship freely and easily and these people have done profound damage to my abilty to trust. And most of all, I never had any closure. I kept rethinking, blaming them, then myself, then miscommunication, then them and then myself again. To this day I dont know why all of this happend. Did I act like an unfathomable monster, or did my friend simply not give a shit enough to help me through this. I dont fucking know and I cant deny either options. Maybe I am talking through a completely selfish wrapped sens of perception that is not to be trusted. I wouldnt be surprised. I have a very hard time relying on my own brain lately. My health is deteriorating very fast, and shit is getting worse.

The second reason is that I am going to be interned for psychiatric issues for the next 3 months. For the first time in my life I think Ill finally get all the professional support i need, available and close. Im not going to be investing any time in the fandom, if simply talking to the psychiatrist abt this catastrophic strings of fallouts. I might be posting some luzenis, but frankly i doubt it. I only make fanart when I am happy, or sad enough but still capable. Im neither right now. You are not entitled to any of these informations, but I just wanted to write them out of my mind because I have a LOT of baggage to go on through and this is an extra bag I dont need so im throwing it out.

You cannot gauge an entire fandom from your perspective, the same way you cannot gauge an entire userbase. No, tiktokers are not the worst people in humanity. Neither are reddit users. Being on tumblr is cool, but it doesnt make u better than being on twitter. And so this is only my opinion of the lupin fandom. I met some amazing persons that i wish the best for, for ever and ever, but in all the niceties and welcoming you might see, I dont think that extends to a person with mental illnesses that are villified, or out of their control. I can fairly say that my experience was disapointing, and I dont intend to rekindle anything. Ill just be on the fringe maintaining the spirit of luzeni alive because fuck you monkey punch these are my characters now by law.

If you read until this bro get a life. Also im joking, youv given me more consideration than most people i met have. If your take after this is that I am deranged, then youv read right.

Thank you for reading. This blog has always been a pleasure to post on, even my most cringe and embarassing shippy stuff. Ive been met with nothint but support, and I truly enjoy being here because of you. I hope this isnt a 3+ month long goodbye. I hope I draw my lovers again. But I cant guarantee anything. I wish you all health most of all, and love and compassion.

#evacuating emotional baggage through a long rant that you dont have to read #this post is for me and me alone really. i feel better after writing it. thou rverything is still catastrophic #there will be grace

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